


I Want You Back

by orphan_account



Category: Adam Levine (Musician), Blake Shelton (Musician), The Voice (US) RPF
Genre: M/M, Shevine, Tumblr Request Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2014-05-08
Packaged: 2018-01-14 03:19:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1250812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blake's life is in total chaos as he sees his marriage crumbling and finds out his best friend is in love with him. But when the dust settles he realizes that he wants to take Adam up on his promise to love him better than anyone else ever has before. Is it too late for Blake to get a second chance?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> This story is in response to a request sent into the Tumblr group Shevine Fan Fiction (shevinefanfic.tumblr.com)

It would be a long time before Blake would be able to   
come to terms with what happened the night after the   
results show, two weeks before the finale of the spring   
edition of The Voice. 

They often when back to Adam's place after the results   
shows, sometimes consoling each other for what team   
members they had lost that round. Blake and Adam both   
tended to get really attached to their teams, though   
Adam tended to be more neurotic and self blaming over   
his loses than Blake. Not that he was immune from   
feelings of having failed a person.

That night, he didn't realize the person he would fail   
wasn't going to be one of his team members, but the   
person closest to him. 

It started out just like a typical night for them. They   
were sitting on Adam's couch, drinking vodka with coke.   
Blake had managed to escape any eliminations on his   
team that night, but Adam had lost one person and only   
had one dog left in the race while Blake still had two.   
They got pretty competitive with each other, but they   
also didn't hesitate to offer suggestions that were   
helpful either. After all, they wanted the contestants   
to succed as musicians, even if they didn't win the   
whole thing. 

"It's so hard picking out songs for this guy," Adam   
groaned and sighed heavily. "I think I have a perfect   
song for him, but I need to get it cleared first...he   
needs to have a big moment next week. Show up your two   
girls."

Blake smirked. "You think he can do that, hmmm? I'll   
admit, he is pretty good, but I have a few aces up my   
sleeve." Then he dropped the cocky bravdo, looking   
closely at Adam. "I bet you can get the clearence.   
You're Adam fucking Levine...the enigma." 

"Enigma?" He raised an eyebrow in return. "Someone's   
been using the dictionary lately."

"Yeah, I had to use it to prop up one of the legs on my   
bed," He laughed and drained his glass. 

"I think you're a lot smarter than you think. Or look."   
Adam laughed and finished off his glass as well. "I   
think we should order a pizza."

"It's never a bad time for pizza." Blake agreed and   
glanced at the two liter of coke. "More coke too, I   
think..." 

"Miranda doesn't let you drink coke at home?" He teased   
and shook his head a little. "You are whipped, my boy."

Blake took a deep breath and a bit of saddness came   
into his eyes. His marriage wasn't going as well as he   
had hoped it would. They'd been together six years   
before hand, so it seemed like getting married was just   
putting a legal clause on what they already had. But   
that was before they both had the kind of success they   
had now and it had changed things in the relationship. 

Adam noticed the look and frowned, concerned. "You   
okay?" 

"Yes." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "No.   
I don't know. Things aren't going so good with me and   
Miranda right now." 

"I'm sorry," Adam sighed, his face turning thoughtful.   
"You want to talk about it?"

He shrugged. "Not much to talk about. We've just been   
growing apart so much the past year. Seems like we ran   
out of things to say to each other. I think we want   
different things in life. I feel like...she's going to   
come next week, be here for the finale. And I guess   
when we go back to Oklahoma after...I think it's our   
last chance to fix things." 

"How do you feel about that?" His friend peered at him   
with those beautiful hazel eyes, an expression in them   
that Blake couldn't quite place. 

"I think...I have a hard time believin' I'll ever find   
someone again. But I love Miranda...I always will...and   
if she's happier without me.." He trailing off, bending   
over at the waist, elbows on his thighs and hands   
dangling between his legs. 

Adam shook his head. "Blake...I hope you two can work   
it out, but if you can't, that doesn't mean you're   
going to be alone the rest of your life." 

Blake glanced at him and smiled a little. "Maybe I'll   
have to come crash here for awhile, make it a bachelor   
pad until you find another supermodel." 

"Yeah, well," He shrugged. "I might need to take a   
break...I don't know..."

"The world must be coming to an end!" Blake teased him   
in return, hoping to bring the mood of the situation   
back up. "Or is there already someone in mind?" 

"Maybe."

"Who?" 

"You'll find out eventually..." 

Blake grinned. "I better. I want to give 'er my   
personal seal of approval. Make sure she's good enough   
for you."

Adam didn't smile back, instead he look at Blake   
closely. Blake wondered if something was wrong, if this   
girl was maybe with someone else and that's why there   
was that saddness etched on his friend's face. 

"Now you look like a kicked puppy..." He put his arm   
around the younger man. "Do you need to talk?" 

He shook his head a little, those eyes still intently   
looking at his face. Then he bent over and before Blake   
could say or do anything, Adam was pressing his lips   
against Blake's lips. And the thing was, he didn't want   
to do anything about it. It felt so good, so right it   
made his stomach turn over. 

When they finally parted, Adam looked at him   
cautiously. Blake got the impression he was waiting for   
him to punch him in the face. But Blake didn't feel   
like punching Adam. Honestly he didn't know whether he   
wanted another kiss or to run away. 

After three years, it never occured to him that he   
could be attracted to Adam that way, yet he could feel   
the excitement coursing through his veins. Maybe all   
the touching and hugging and kissing hadn't been a joke   
or loving on his best bro...maybe it had been him   
wanting just this very thing. 

But it wasn't that simple. He was married, he'd always   
seen himself as straight and he knew that there was a   
reason there were no openly gay country singers. And   
Nashville certainly wouldn't tolerate a country singer   
that had been married to woman and then suddenly took   
up with a amn. He wasn't sure if any of that mattered,   
because it did feel right, but he did know that being   
married did matter. 

"Adam..." He sighed and reached out to touch the other   
man's face gently. "I don't have any words for this..."

"Tell me that you haven't been faking it...that you   
haven't been pretending..." Adam's voice cracked   
slightly. "Tell me it's not just me who feels like   
that."

"I can tell you that," Blake said slowly. "But...I'm   
married. I gotta...I can't just...dammit...I never   
planned on this..." 

"I didn't either." He replied quietly. "But it happened   
and I can't help it. I love you, Blake." 

Blake felt his heart stop for a moment, then two more   
beats came together hard at once. "Adam...you know I   
love you...but I can't...I can't do this..." 

"I was afraid you would say that." Adam put his head   
into his hands. "And I know it's not just about you   
being married. It's about your career. Your image. How   
you see yourself." 

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair again,   
restless. "I don't...I can't lie to you and say that   
those things aren't in there too. My whole life, I   
never saw this coming." 

"And you don't want to go further than this?" Adam's   
hand hooked lightly around Blake's thigh. "I don't   
normally believe in cheating either, Blake...but if you   
and Miranda are already on the outs...let me show you   
just how easy you are to love. You don't ever have to   
be alone, Blake." 

"Adam..." He reached down and gently removed the man's   
hand from his leg and stood up. "I'm sorry...but I   
can't. Not now...I'm so sorry." 

Blake saw the nod and the way Adam's shoulder drooped,   
his head fell into his hands. Then he couldn't see much   
of anything at all through the haze of tears in his   
eyes. He didn't want to hurt the person he cared about   
so much, but the confusion was prowling restlessly   
through his mind like a caged animal. 

It was one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do,   
but he looked down at his friend one last time before   
heading to the door. He paused a moment before he let   
himself out, but he forced himself not to look back. It   
was like a knife in his gut to see the pain on Adam's   
face and know he had put it there. 

The spring air was still a bit cool, even in Los   
Angeles. When Blake stepped outside, it made the tears   
sliding down his cheeks sting slightly. But it didn't   
compare at all to the hurt in his heart.


	2. Chapter One

Almost four months later, Blake was finishing up his   
packing to go back to LA for the fall session of "The   
Voice." They were going to film the Knock out rounds in   
two days and then start the live shows two weeks later,   
and this time he was planning on staying in LA for the   
whole season. As much as he loved Oklahoma, he needed   
some time away from the ranch. 

And the memories.

Sitting on his night stand table was the paperwork that   
had changed his life; the discharge for him and   
Miranda's divorce. Oklahoma had a ninety day waiting   
period after filing and could give a discharge within   
ten days after if the divorce was not contested. As   
much as it broke his heart, he stuck to what he'd told   
Adam...if that was what she really wanted, he wanted   
Miranda to be happy. With or without him. 

The two weeks after Adam had confessed how he felt   
about him had been very awkward, even more so with his   
wife around. Blake had hoped they would be able to   
patch things up and that his friendship with Adam could   
be repaired. That had been one of the times in his life   
that Blake Shelton had been totally wrong.

He and Adam had done everything they could to keep   
things looking good between them on camera, but they   
weren't hanging around after the shows like they always   
had in the past. Blake wanted to think it was because   
Miranda was there, but he wasn't so sure of that at   
all. There was too much pain in the other man's eyes to   
think it was just respecting the couple's space.

Making matters worse, the day after the finale they got   
back to Oklahoma and Blake hadn't had a chance to fix   
things with Adam. So he was already feeling pretty low   
when he met Miranda at the table that morning. That was   
when she explained she felt they'd grown in different   
directions and she wanted to dissolve their marriage so   
they could each be free to live their lives apart. 

So now, almost four months after the ball was set into   
motion Blake was without the two most important people   
in his life. He had given Miranda her wings and wished   
her well, but he wasn't sure he could just close the   
door on Adam. 

Through some very lonely months he'd been thinking   
about the way the other man had kissed him, the way it   
had felt all of the times he had wrapped his arms   
around him. It had felt so right, but he kept telling   
himself he was a married man, it was just friendship. 

But now he wasn't so sure that was true. 

And some of those lonely nights, he felt tears burn his   
eyes. In the back of his mind, a verse he'd heard   
somewhere a long, long time ago echoed 'the saddest   
words of mouth and pen, are those words what could have   
been.' He didn't really know what that meant truly   
until now. At least with Miranda he'd gotten a chance   
to explore that possiblity and even though it fell   
apart, he couldn't say he didn't have a chance to make   
it work. 

But there were other nights that kiss came to his mind   
and he touched himself. Obviously that was not a normal   
response if he was this perfectly straight guy and Adam   
was his perfectly straight best friend. And yet...he   
felt more exhilirated than he had in a while in those   
secret moments in the middle of the night. 

So Blake had a mission going back to LA that morning.   
He was going to go to Adam and tell him that he wanted   
to see what could happen...if what he had offered four   
months ago was still available. And if it   
wasn't...well...he would just have to earn it. 

********

It was a rare rainy afternoon in Los Angles, but it was   
the third week of September so that happened now and   
then in the fall. Almost four months since that night   
the first week of June when Adam had kissed Blake and   
told him how he felt. And almost four months since   
Blake had shot Adam down. 

Adam tried to be fair in his feelings. Blake was   
married, after all, and normally he wasn't into   
cheating either. He'd done it once and it had been one   
of the most demoralizing experiences in his life, one   
he didn't want to repeat again. But he knew that Blake   
and Miranda wouldn't be able to work it out and he   
wanted to comfort his friend.

If Blake would've let him, Adam would've shown him that   
no one would ever love him the way he did. But now, he   
didn't see how that was going to happen. Maybe it   
wasn't entirely fair, but he felt rejected. If Blake   
had said that he needed to see what happened with   
Miranda first, that wouldn't have stung so much. But he   
just said he couldn't do it and walked out. It felt so   
much more like a rejection then if they had at least   
talked about it and then Blake would've stayed.

The next morning they were going to film the Knock Out   
rounds and Adam wasn't looking forward to it as much as   
he normally might have. He worked with his team that   
morning and made a point to be out of there before his   
path could cross Blake's. Tomorrow they would be   
expected to be friends again, to have a bromance again,   
to pretend everything was just fine between them   
because that's what everyone thought. No one knew the   
truth but him and Blake. 

Instead of doing something fun or relaxing with his   
afternoon off, Adam had been sulking. Wondering how he   
would slap on a smile and pretend he hadn't had his   
heart broken by his best friend. By the man he had   
loved. Honestly, still loved. That was the worst part,   
if he had gotten over that maybe they could salvage the   
friendship. But four months had done nothing to change   
the fact that Adam loved Blake and, it seemed at this   
point, always would love him. 

He was sprawled on the couch fiddling with his phone   
listlessly when the doorbell rang. He didn't hear   
anyone buzz at the gate, so it had to have been someone   
who had their own code. That narrowed the field down   
some, but it didn't prepare him for the surprise of   
finding a soaking wet, six foot five Okie on his   
doorstep. 

"Blake..." Adam blinked. "What are you doing here?" 

"Mind inviting me inside first? It's raining like hell   
out here..." Blake didn't make eye contact with him,   
ducking his head a little. 

Adam actually had to think about it for a moment, then   
stepped aside wordlessly. Blake moved in past him,   
taking off his wet denim jacket and hanging it up.   
Hopefully he wasn't planning on staying long, because   
Adam didn't know what he had to say to him.

"Figured you would be getting settled at your place."   
He finally spoke up to fill the empty space. 

"We need to talk," Blake ran a hand through his dark   
hair where more strands of silver seemed to have woven   
in during their time apart. "We really need to talk,   
Adam." 

"So talk," Adam headed back to the couch, feeling tense   
and restless inside. It hurt to have him this close. He   
sat down and gazed at the older man with a mixture of   
caution, grief and resentment. 

Blake sat down beside him and finally they made eye   
contact. His blue eyes were also grieved, but was it   
for the same reason as Adam's or was it about his   
failed marriage? It was hard to say. 

"You haven't spoken to me without the cameras on in   
four months." Blake began slowly. "I'm sure you know   
Miranda and I got a divorce. Got the discharge two days   
ago, right before I came out here."

Adam nodded a little. "I heard. I'm sorry." 

"Could've used a friend." He admitted with a sigh.   
"But...I guess I understand why you haven't exactly   
been banging down my door lately."

"Do you?" There was a touch of ice in Adam's voice.   
"Why are you here, Blake?"

"'Cus I fucked up." He turned to look at Adam. "I   
didn't...things didn't work out the right way last   
time. I didn't...I guess I hurt you and I didn't mean   
to." 

Adam's jaw tensed. "You're damn right you hurt me,   
Blake. If you don't feel the same way, fine. If you   
didn't feel right doing anything behind Miranda's back,   
fine, I can respect that even. But you couldn't even   
fucking talk it out...you just ran out on me."

"I know," Blake nodded slowly. "And I shouldn't   
have...I really shouldn't have done that. I would never   
want to hurt you, Adam. You're my best friend...and I   
love you."

"Sure you're not trying to psych yourself into putting   
on a good show tomorrow?" He regretted the words as   
soon as they were out of his mouth and he saw the hurt   
cross Blake's face. "Shit...that didn't come out   
right."

"I probably deserved that." 

"There was nothing stopping you from picking up the   
phone or sending a text either, you know." Adam   
continued in a softer voice, looking down at his hands. 

"No." Blake agreed. "But I had to work it out all in my   
head. And when I started figuring it out...I wanted to   
get things wrapped up with my marriage first.   
Before..." 

He trailed off and Adam looked up, frowning. "Before   
what?" 

"Before I came back here and...told you I want you." 

Adam felt his heart skip a beat and then pound twice as   
hard to make up for it. Those were the words he'd   
wanted to hear almost from that first season of the   
show, but they were coming after four months of grief,   
thinking any chance with the country star was gone for   
good. And on top of that, a smaller part of him was   
afraid this was some sort of rebound thing.

"Blake..." He sighed, feeling very weary. "You know I   
want that more than anything, right? But I don't....how   
am I supposed to take that seriously when you don't   
speak to me for four months? And maybe you're just   
afraid of being alone....maybe you're grasping at   
straws. How can I think this is really what you want?"

"Adam..." He reached over and took the other man by the   
hand. "Think about that night, okay? Think about what I   
said...I said I can't...I never said I didn't want to   
or I wasn't interested. I'm pretty sure I even told you   
that I love you..." 

Adam swallowed hard and looked away, feeling tears   
gather in his eyes. "Then why...how could you just walk   
out like that?" 

"Adam..." Blake's hand dropped his hand and reached out   
to cradle the other man's cheek in his big, warm hand.   
Adam hated himself for turning into the contact but it   
felt so good. And he'd missed it so much. 

"You have to understand. I come from a different place   
than you do...it would be really frowned upon to let it   
out the things I thought about us doin'. Even before   
the last time I saw you. And...I kept tellin' myself it   
was just because I loved you so much as a friend. But I   
think I've been lying to myself. And I've missed you so   
damn much the last four months you don't even know. But   
I was afraid I'd fucked things up...I didn't know how   
to make it better...and I wanted to be...be really   
available before I told you all this..." 

Adam swallowed hard, letting his hazel eyes finally   
meet Blake's. The man had the most amazing blue eyes   
he'd ever seen. "I want to believe you. You have no   
idea how much I want to believe you, Blake. But the   
last four months have been hell. I can't just...pretend   
you didn't walk out of here without giving a fuck about   
how I felt." 

"You really think I felt that way?" Blake frowned.   
"Adam...it killed me to know I'd hurt you. Please..."

"No..." Adam reached out and put one finger on Blake's   
lips to stop him from talking anymore. "I'm not saying   
I don't still love you, because as hard as I've tried   
to stop...I can't. I love you. But I need to know that   
this isn't you doing this to get our friendship back or   
because you're afraid of being alone. I need to know   
you want this because you love me the way I love you.   
Understand?" 

He took his finger away and Blake nodded slowly, his   
tongue unconsciously coming out to touch his lip where   
Adam's finger had been. "How are you going to know   
that, Adam? What do I have to do?" 

"You have to prove it." A slight smile crossed his   
face. "You have to show me."

"Show you?" He raised an eyebrow. 

"Show me." Adam repeated himself, standing up to lead   
Blake back to the door. "Show me that you really want   
me. Show me that you really love me. If you really   
do...then you'll know how to do it." 

Before Blake could say anything more, Adam gently pushed him out of the door and closed it behind him. He wanted it all to work out with Blake, but he had to protect his heart this time. So Blake was going to have to prove his love. He needed that, and if he saw that Blake was sincere, he would give him the love he'd wanted to share so badly with the other man.

Adam leaned against the door and closed his eyes, silently praying that Blake would be able to do it.


	3. Chapter Two

Blake was very nervous when he got onto the set the next afternoon. He felt like he was jumping out of skin and through it all he had to act like he was calm and just looking forward to another go round of the Knock-Outs. But as he was going through wardrobe and make up, he kept looking for Adam. 

He'd called almost ninety minutes before he even got to the studio, making sure there were a dozen red roses waiting in Adam's dressing room for when the rock star arrived to get ready for the show. He honestly wasn't sure if you sent other men flowers or not, but this whole thing was new to him. Blake had never been attracted to another man before. Maybe he noticed if they were attractive, but he never had the urge to kiss and touch another man before he'd met Adam. When he'd tried to kiss some of his guy friends before at country music events, he was just screwing around. But with Adam, it was different.

With Adam everything was different. That's why he needed to convince him that what he felt was real. Blake knew all too well what could happen in rebound relationships, but he felt like it didn't count this time because he had fallen in love with Adam before he'd even been available. The more he thought about it, the harder it was for Blake to pinpoint the moment that friendship became love. Perhaps it had just always been that way. 

Blake was sitting in the makeup chair when Adam settled in the chair beside him, flashing a bright smile in his direction. Apparently he'd gotten the roses and sending flowers to another man was appropriate. 

"Hey Big Country..." He greeted him like that night four months ago had never happened. "You ready for the Knock Outs?" 

"As ready as I ever get for the damn things..." Blake shook his head a little, his dislike of the on-the-spot decisions of that round very well known by now. "It's going to be interesting to see who listened to me yesterday and who didn't."

"I hope they were listening to what I said yesterday too," Adam nodded, then turned his head to give Blake a meaningful look. 

Suddenly Blake didn't think they were talking about their artists anymore. Of course with the makeup artists dancing around them to get them ready for the cameras, they couldn't exactly say much. It was one thing to be touchy feely and silly and teasing, but it would be another to have a heartfelt discussion about their relationship in front of the crew. 

Though he imagined that if Adam did give him another chance, sooner or later things were going to come out. Blake realized that was inevitable and it scared the shit out of him. But that fear seemed small compared to the lonliness he'd felt for the other man, especially the last few weeks. 

"Well, let's see what happens." Blake nodded a little, finally feeling the need to say something. "I hope we both find out our people were listening." 

Adam gave him a little smile and nodded, his eyes back to the warm brown that Blake loved, not the cold, pained look that had been in them the afternoon before. But there wasn't the happy, care free expression that he normally saw in them when they were together. At least the affection was still there, though somehow it seemed more guarded. He hoped he really was seeing it there, prayed it wasn't an illusion of his own desperate need to know he really could get another chance.

He was relieved when the makeup artists left them alone for awhile. Leaning over, Blake whispered into Adam's ear. "You wanna get together after the show?" 

"What do you have in mind?" 

Adam turned and looked at him, his face so close to Blake's it would have been very easy to kiss him. And his lips looked so soft. It seemed that all he could think about now was how that first kiss had felt and how it had been four months since it happened. And he hadn't even been aware enough to enjoy it properly, though he had enjoyed it. 

"Uh...a date." Blake licked his lower lip without really realizing he was doing it, staring at the other man's mouth. "We could get something to eat. Go out or order in...whatever sounds better to you. I mean, I'm staying in LA til the end of the season...not leaving at all, so it would be good to find some good places to eat. And most dates involve food, right?'

"You're nervous," Adam smirked a little, not bothering to move his face away from Blake's. "It's me, Blake..."

"Yeah, I know." He sighed, still unable to stop from looking at Adam's lips. "But dammit...I just don't want to mess things up even more." 

Blake couldn't hold back any longer and before Adam could reply, he leaned in and kissed him firmly on the mouth. It was a bit strange to be kissing another man, but Adam's lips were soft and supple, and the strange feeling left almost immediately. All he felt now was happiness and more than a little arousal too. He reached up and cupped his cheek, sighing at how smooth the other man's skin was and how perfect it felt against the palm of his hand. 

There was a knock on the door and the two men jerked away from each other like they were teenagers being caught necking by their parents. The stage manager didn't seem to notice anything out of line, or if he did it didn't show on his face. He nodded at them, holding up two fingers to indicate that they would be ready to start filming in two minutes. 

"Time to go out, guys." 

He got to his feet and nodded, glancing over at Adam. He was glad they didn't have time to talk now. The last thing he wanted to hear was that things were too messed up to be fixed with the taste of the rock star's lips still lingering on his own. 

********

After they were done filming, Adam went backstage to get ready to go home. A smile crossed his face when he saw the roses. That was a gesture most men didn't ever recieve, and he knew that Blake was at least trying. And it was cute he was so nervous trying to ask if he wanted to get together after the show. 

He didn't have much time to dwell, though, before there was a knock on the door. True to Blake form, five seconds after the knock he just let himself into Adam's dressing room. They'd never been too big on giving each other their personal space. At least that part of things was still normal. 

"So...where do you want to go?" Blake asked after he closed the door behind him. "I'm up for anything. Just about anything. Not that es-car-gotey thing..so if you want French, please tell me they serve more than that. Snails are snot with trailers." 

Adam couldn't help but laugh at that statement. "Believe it or not, Blake, escargote doesn't rank high on my list of foods either. In fact, I've never tried it. I did, however, try squid...they call it calamari...and it was really good." 

"Calamari is SQUID?" The look on Blake's face was almost comical. "Shit...I've eaten fried squid?" 

He laughed and nodded. "You've eaten fried squid if you've had calamari before, yes." 

"It was good, but I think I'll stick to onion rings. Jalpeno poppers. Shit like that." Blake wrinkled his nose. "Anyway...do we have a date?" 

"You consider it a date, huh?" Adam smirked a little. He liked the sound of that, considering how many times they'd gotten food and drinks together before, though they almost always went back to his place. They'd never really had a sit down dinner before, and he liked the idea of that.

"Yeah," He nodded and looked at him closely. "I mean..you do too, don't ya?" 

He nodded, the smile coming bigger now. "I really want it to be a date. I don't think we've ever gone out to eat together. Are you sure you're okay with that? Not going to damage your good ol' boy image?"

"Adam...I don't think it matters anymore." Blake shrugged his big shoulders and sighed. "I mean...you want me to show you how I feel, right? So stop worrying about everything and let me show you."

Adam walked over to Blake and looked deeply into his eyes. He was honestly afraid of getting hurt. He wanted a future with Blake so much, and he was afraid of letting himself feel it was possible before it seemed certain. Having him walk out was hard enough, but the closer he got, the harder it would be if this was just a mistaken case of friendship love for romantic love or a fear of being alone after his marriage had collapsed.

But if Adam was being honest enough with himself to admit he was afraid, he should also be honest enough to admit that Blake was already so close to his heart that no matter what happened, pain was inevitable. But maybe if they could be together and work through things, the pain would be broken up with many days of happiness. 

"Okay," He finally nodded a little, an almost shy smile touching his lips. "Where are we going?"

Blake considered it for a moment. "You like the beach, right? There's a little cafe down near the beach. Not this end of town, like the poorer end of town. It's usually not too crowded. I'm not even sure what kind of food they serve...but it's got uh, whaddya call it...ambeyonce?" 

"That sounds good to me," Adam nodded his agreement. At this point he would've agreed to eating under a bridge to have an official date with Blake. "Let me drive, though, okay? No offense Big Country, but you need to work on your LA driving technique."

The country singer laughed in return and nodded. "Yeah, not that many dirt roads out this way. But I guess I'll pick it up now...gonna be here for like four months straight. I think that's the longest time ever." 

"It's a great city, it's even got a lot of nature." He never missed an oppritunity to talk up his home town. "You just need the right tour guide."

"You offering?" Blake gave him a crooked smile as they walked out of Adam's dressing room. "Because if you are, I'm up for it." 

Adam couldn't think of anything he'd like better than having a chance to spend time with Blake and showing him what the city had to offer. Perhaps maybe even he could convince him to spend more time in the city between seasons. But he was putting the cart before the horse, something he was very good at in relationships.

"Yeah." He nodded. "I think I'd enjoy having an excuse to spend extra time with you."

"Don't need an excuse," Blake shrugged as they headed out to the parking area. "I mean, I want to spend extra time with you anyway." 

Adam didn't say anything as he unlocked his Porsche and settled behind the wheel. He didn't know why he was being so cautious. It was just Blake, his Blake, his best friend, the same person he was four months ago when being around him had been the easiest, best thing in the world. Blake who had always been there for him. He couldn't negate all of that just because he walked out when Adam revealed his feelings. It hadn't been a rejection, not outright even if it felt like one. And maybe if he kept him at arm's length Blake would get frusterated and give up. But God, he was so scared to lose him completely! 

"You okay there?" Blake said as he settled into the seat beside him, looking a little uncomfortable as he tried to fit his long legs into the little sports car. "Damn, you get this one out of a cracker jack box or something?"

"Yeah, it was a five thousand pound box. You can only buy them in Lithuania" He deadpanned, ignoring the first question. 

"Bullshit," The other man chuckled and shook his head a little. "If you're really okay, are you ready for our first date?" 

Adam couldn't help but smile when Blake put it that way. "Yeah, I think I am. You'll have to give me directions."


	4. Chapter Three

The drive to the little diner on the beach was more   
relaxed than Blake's insides felt. He didn't know why   
he was so nervous about going on an actual date with   
Adam. He'd known him for three years and he could   
honestly say the rock star was one of his very best   
friends. But he wanted more than that...he wanted a   
chance to show Adam that he loved him in a way that   
wasn't going to go away.

"There it is..." He jerked out of his nervous jumble of   
thoughts to point out a small, faded white building   
with big windows sitting only a few feet back from the   
beach. "I think the drive's right here." 

"I see it," Adam turned into the parking lot and looked   
for a place. "Great location. The beach isn't so built   
up around here, so we might actually see some wildlife   
beyond floating trash." 

He gave Blake a happy smile that made the cowboy's   
heart flip flop a little after he put the Porsche in   
park and hopped out of the car. It took Blake a little   
bit more effort to get out of the tiny sports vehicle,   
grumbling under his breath about the car being too damn   
small for normal people. 

Blake was finally able to get out and catch up to Adam.   
He opened the door for him, though he honestly had no   
clue what the procedure was for two guys out on a date.   
Did he open the door every other time and let Adam get   
it rest of the time? Did whoever got there first open   
it? He was confused, but he was determined to try to   
get it right. 

"Smells good in here," Adam commented as they stepped   
into the resturant. There was a bar and a half dozen   
tables in the interior part of the building, then two   
steps down there was a "U" shaped section that went   
around three sides of the building, lined with small   
tables that sat four and a wall of nearly ceiling to   
floor length windows.

"Let's see down there," Blake motioned to the windows.   
"Got a good view of the beach." 

"Of course," He nodded a little and smiled. "Let's grab   
a table, I think you seat yourself."

Of course, once they went down to the table Blake was   
faced with the dilemma of whether to pull Adam's chair   
out or not. He stood there a moment looking like a deer   
in the headlights. 

"Relax," Adam chuckled and sat down. "And sit down." 

Blake's bottom dropped into the chair and he gave his   
date a sheepish smile. "I just don't...you know...know   
the protocol and all."

"Hey, this is my first date with a guy too..." Adam   
leaned in, lowering his voice. "I mean, I've messed   
around with a few guys, but none of them ever bought me   
dinner first." 

He flashed a smile at Blake, one the country singer   
recognized quite well. It was the same one he got   
whenever Adam did something on the show to goad him, he   
always ended it with that cocky little smart ass smile.   
But this time, he wasn't trying to goad him. It seemed   
like he was trying to tease him in another manner   
completely. 

"Well, I am a gentleman." Blake answered matter of   
factly. "And...I guess we'll just seat ourselves and   
open doors ourselves? Does that work for you?" 

"Definitely," He chuckled a little and picked up a   
menu. "It would look kind of weird, pulling the chairs   
out for each other. And I would be pissed if you always   
did it for me. We're both men. I'm not going to the   
woman here. Neither one of us should have to be...we   
are who we are." 

Blake was visibly relieved at hearing that. "Well, I   
didn't want you to be a woman either. Or else I'd be   
out with a woman. I want you as you are...the Adam   
Levine I fell for in the first place."

He was sure he detected a faint blush on Adam's cheeks   
as the other man opened the menu. Blake opened his as   
well, glancing over at his date every few seconds. It   
was strange to him that Adam didn't seem to react to   
what he said about falling for him. 

"Adam?" Blake knew this wasn't the time or place to   
start something, but he had to know. "You okay?" 

"I'm great," Adam smiled and it seemed sincere. "I was   
thinking I'd like to have a steak. It seems like they   
have a little bit of everything here...if the food is   
good, we should put this on the list of places to come   
back to." He folded his menu and set it on the table. 

"And you can't beat that view." 

Blake was a little relieved to hear Adam talking about   
having a list of places to revisit. That had to mean he   
didn't think this was going to be a one time thing,   
right? He needed to stop worrying so much. Forcing   
himself to take a deep breath and chill the fuck out,   
he smiled at Adam.

"That view is amazing." He agreed with a little nod.   
"That's definitely one thing you don't see in   
Oklahoma..."

"When was the last time you went to the beach?" Adam   
looked at him out of the corner of his eye. 

"I visit a few times every season." Blake shrugged a   
little. "Not like, laying out burning my skin off, but   
I go for a walk, looking at the sunset. I love nature.   
It's the most beautiful thing in the world, I   
think...sunsets and the water and the woods. It feels   
almost sacred, you know?" 

Those beautiful hazel eyes that were turning to him   
were another of nature's best work in Blake's mind. He   
started to open his mouth, but Adam spoke first.

"I never thought you were such a romantic. Even though   
I have to admit country music is pretty damn romantic."   
Adam smiled thoughtfully. 

"You have no idea how romantic I can be." He replied   
pointedly. 

Then the waitress was there to take their order,   
stopping Adam from replying. Blake was glad for that.   
He didn't want anything to spoil the moment. As far as   
moments went it was a pretty great one when the   
waitress walked away and left them alone. The light   
from the early evening sun came in through the windows   
and feel across Adam's face in a way that couldn't be   
called anything other than truly beautiful.

Blake felt his heart constrict with love for the other   
man. Even if he didn't truly understand the ins and   
outs of being with a guy yet, he did know he loved   
Adam. And at the end of the day, he wanted to believe   
that was the only thing that really mattered. 

*****

Dinner was actually a lot of fun once Blake loosened up   
and Adam pushed all the worries he had about the   
possibility of them having a relationship into the back   
of his head. He had told Blake he needed to prove that   
he really wanted him, now the trick was standing back   
and letting him have the chance to do it without   
worrying himself to death.

"Still plenty of light out there," Blake nodded to the   
beach outside the window as they were waiting for the   
check. "Wanna take a walk?" 

"On the beach?" Adam's lips twitched up into a pleased   
smile. "Yeah. That would be cool. Can't beat watching   
the sun set into the ocean."

Blake smiled too. "It's one of my favorite parts about   
bein' in LA." 

When the waitress came back with the check, Blake   
picked it up without giving Adam a chance to even   
consider paying half. He wasn't going to complain,   
though, since it had been Blake's idea to take him on a   
real date. So when they went up to the counter to pay,   
he eyeballed the pictures of the cafe from the over the   
last four decades on the walls. The same married couple   
was standing in front for each picture.

Adam had always questioned whether he was cut out for   
marriage or not. In his twenties he had been fairly   
promiscious, something he saw now as making up for not   
having girls really interested in him in high school.   
He did love women, but he also had crushes on men for   
as long as he could remember. And there had been a few   
friends he'd experimented with over the years, though   
he hadn't gone all the way with any of them. 

If things went that far, Blake would be the first man   
he actually had proper sex with and Adam was willing to   
bet that the same went for Blake himself. It was a   
powerful thought, but one he decided to put on hold for   
now. Once again he was putting the cart before the   
horse. And there was also the possiblity that Blake   
would chicken out the first time things got hot and   
heavy between them. 

"Earth to Adam?" Blake's voice broke him out of his reverie and Adam hoped the sheepish smile he gave   
didn't betray he'd been thinking about sex.

"Sorry. Ran out of attention span there."

The country singer chuckled a little in return, nodding   
his head. One of his huge hands touched the small of   
Adam's back as he guided him towards the door in a   
gesture that he was sure Blake didn't even realize he   
was doing. But he sort of liked it. He didn't want to   
be treated like a woman, not in the least, but he   
didn't want to be treated just like one of Blake's guy   
buddies either. At least not in most ways...being best   
friends was fun too and he didn't want to lose that to   
gain a relationship.

So many thoughts. Adam's feet carried him out of the   
door and around the back of the resturant to the beach.   
The change in footing brought him back to earth and he   
glanced at Blake. 

"Are you gonna get sand in your cowboy boots?" He   
glanced at the taller man with a little smirk. 

"Probably," Blake shrugged. "You're gonna get sand in   
your...shoes." 

Adam shook his head and leaned on his friend for a   
moment to rid himself of his shoes and then his socks.   
"There! Now we can complete the walk on the beach   
moment by going down to the surf." 

The look on the other man's face was skeptical. "You   
want me to take my boots off?" 

"Well duh," He laughed in return. "Come on, Blake, get   
some sand between your toes. It'll be awesome, I   
promise. And I won't tell anyone if you have hammer toe   
or anything..."

Blake watched him for a moment then sighed, leaning on   
Adam now to get his boots off. "You are the only person   
I'd do this for, I hope you know that."

"Showing your naked feet in public! Scandalous!" Adam   
teased him further, and once the cowboy dropped his   
boots and socks on the sand, he grabbed them. "Hold   
that thought..."

Adam trotted back to the car and dropped both sets of   
shoes and socks in the back seat. This was LA, if you   
left your shoes on the sand they probably wouldn't be   
there when you got back. And holding your shoes always   
seemed awkward to him. 

Rejoining Blake, he flashed a bright smile at the other   
man. "Okay...let's walk. And by the way, I've seen much   
nastier feet than yours before."

"Compliments will get you no where...especially when   
you lay it on thick like that." Blake deadpanned in his   
drawal. 

"Sorry, that's not my particular fetish." He rolled his   
eyes as they headed for the surf side by side.

He raised an eyebrow. "That mean you got fetishes?" 

Adam blushed and ducked his head slightly. "I....am not   
answering that." 

"Well, I hope I find out sooner or later...preferably   
sooner." Blake reached out and touched Adam's elbow   
lightly. 

He was tempted to move away. It definitely might seem a   
little strange if they were caught holding hands on the   
beach, but at least Blake wasn't married anymore. He   
felt the other man's fingers trail lightly down his arm   
until they reached the palm of his hand and took hold.

Adam hesitated a moment, then squeezed the hand back.   
When he glanced at Blake out of the corner of his eye,   
he saw the other man was looking at him closely. 

"What?"

"Every time I try to tell you how I feel, you get real   
quiet. I don't understand, Adam." Blake frowned. "You   
wanted me to show you how I felt. And I'm trying to do   
that. And I keep hearing how important communication   
is...but you don't seem to...you shut down on me. Why?"

He could make up an excuse, but when he looked back at   
Blake and the concern in his beautiful blue eyes hidden   
behind the golden light at the end of the day, he knew   
he had to tell the truth.

"I just want this so badly. I'm afraid you think you   
love me, but you're confusing friendship love for   
another kind of love. Or that you're on the rebound   
after your marriage falling apart. You're afraid to be   
alone. I mean, I'm terrified of being alone too. But I   
don't want to be with someone just because we're both   
afraid of being alone."

His voice cracked slightly and he looked down at the   
sand beneath their feet. "I know you were married when   
I made my feelings known and I realize you aren't the   
cheating kind. But why did you have to just walk out   
like that? It made me feel like I'd done something   
wrong and lost my best friend in the process. Then we   
didn't talk for four months...I know you wanted to deal   
with your marriage, but...dude, it felt you forgot   
about me. Then you come back three days ago declaring   
you're in love with me." 

"I want to believe it." Adam turned so he was standing   
in front of Blake and looked him in the eye. "I want to   
believe it so bad, but I'm also scared."

Blake reached up and pressed a finger to Adam's lips   
before he could say anything more. "I didn't forget   
about you, Adam. I couldn't stop thinking about you.   
And yeah, I should've called. I should've reached out.   
But I was scared too. Not about being alone, but about   
being without you. I thought I'd messed it up. That   
things would never be the same. But...I don't want them   
to be the same anymore."

"You don't?" Adam whispered behind Blake's finger,   
feeling the slight callouses on his lips. 

"No." He took his finger away and closed the distance   
between them. "I want it to be better." 

"Better how?" 

Big hands reached forward and cupped Adam's face,   
drawing him in for a kiss. Blake was taking his time   
now, his lips just caressing Adam's. He kissed back,   
how could he resist those lips? The perfect little bow   
he'd obsessed about kissing for so long. And this time   
it felt so right, so complete.

Once they started kissing, they couldn't seem to stop.   
There was no urgency to it even though twilight was   
fading around them as the sun sank into the water. Arms   
wrapped around each other and it was almost dark when   
Adam finally withdrew with a slight laugh. 

"Is it just me is it getting cold out here?"

"Dunno," Blake smirked lazily. "Feels to me like we're   
both heating up." 

"Back to my place for a nightcap?" Adam suggested.

He nodded and chuckled a little. "Yeah, well,   
considering I left my truck back at the studio, if I   
don't go home with you I'm gonna spend the night on the   
beach."

"Don't press your luck, Shelton." Adam teased and   
dropped a light kiss on Blake's nose before completely   
breaking the embrace. "Let's go."


	5. Chapter Four

Blake felt a rush of excitement when he and Adam piled   
back into the Porsche and headed for Adam's place.   
They'd hung out at his place before, and at the places   
Blake had rented himself every season of The Voice, but   
this time it felt different. Probably because of the   
sense of possibility hanging over the moment. Anything   
could happen this time, and Blake was pretty sure what   
he wanted anything to be. 

Though he'd never even kissed another man before Adam,   
Blake was much more okay with the idea of having sex   
with another man than he ever would have imagined   
possible. But this wasn't just 'another man', this was   
Adam. His best friend, the guy he adored and loved. 

Quite honestly, the idea of touching Adam and having   
Adam touch him was a very arousing one for Blake. He   
had gone way too long without a touch other than his   
own. And the past couple of months he'd been having   
some very detailed fantasies about what might happen   
between them, if he came back to LA to find Adam still   
felt the same way. 

"Blake?" Adam's voice broke him out of his thoughts and   
he realized the car was no longer moving. "You okay   
there, buddy?"

He laughed a little, nodding. "Yeah...sorry. I was kind   
of daydreaming there." 

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow. "Day dreaming about   
what?" 

Blake saw an oppritunity despite the close quarters of   
the car and reached across the center console, dragging   
Adam as close to him as he could get and kissing him   
deeply. A little noise of surprise came from the other   
man, but a second later Adam was kissing him back with   
the same kind of passion. 

His hands were greedy tonight, first framing Adam's   
beautiful face then slowly trailing down his neck.   
Blake took time to feel every muscle in the fit   
shoulders before slowly working their way down his   
perfect chest. He was at turns in awe of Adam's body   
and feeling a little shy about showing his own. But he   
pushed past that and his fingers found the top of his   
jeans. 

"Blake," Adam sighed, breaking the kiss. "Not here..." 

"Not enough room," He agreed, then started kissing   
Adam's neck. His skin was so soft beneath his lips and   
he didn't think he'd ever noticed how graceful the   
curve of the column of flesh was before this moment. 

Adam giggled and Blake knew his eyes were crinkling in   
that absolutely adorable way. "Definitely not enough   
room." He pushed the bigger man away gently.   
"Seriously...one of us is going to get a gear shift   
somewhere that will totally end the festivties for the   
evening."

"Okay, Okay." Blake agreed and pulled back to get out   
of the car. He cringed at the cold concrete of the   
garage beneath his bare feet. "Damn...I forgot to put   
my boots back on."

"You don't need them." Adam shrugged and slipped out of   
the car himself. "When I was growing up my Mom made   
everyone leave their shoes at the door."

"That doesn't work very well if you live out in the   
country." He countered, but followed the other man into   
the house anyway. "Just don't be getting any kinky   
ideas, okay? I don't do that foot fetish stuff. Off the   
table." 

Adam made a face. "Yeah...not a problem." 

Once the door was closed behind them, Blake pounced on   
Adam again before he could even turn the lights on. He   
pulled the rock star tight against his body and his   
mouth found his neck again. His hands were under the   
white t-shirt, touching bare skin for the first time.   
The effect it had on Blake was soon very obvious. 

"Been awhile for you?" Adam's eyes widened a little. 

"Well duh..." Blake scoffed lightly. "I wasn't   
interested in having a fling after Miranda left. I   
wanted you, not some random bed warmer." 

A little smile touched Adam's lips and he pulled away   
again. He took Blake's hand and tugged him over towards   
the couch. Climbing onto the black leather couch, he   
reached over and flicked a lamp on so they had some   
light. Blake thought he looked nervous in the soft   
glow, but he also looked beautiful. Part of him   
wondered if this was just some dream. 

Blake sat beside him on the couch, immediately wrapping   
his arm around Adam's waist to draw him close. Adam   
took the hint and stradled over his lap, a knee resting   
beside either hip. This time the rock star was the one   
to initiate the kiss. It was softer now, more tender. 

"Blake..." Adam whispered, his lips trailing down to   
the hollow of his throat, sending Blake's senses into   
overdrive. "Is this okay? Really okay?"

"It'd be more okay if you took your shirt off." He gave   
a charming, boyish grin.

Adam chuckled and kissed him again on the mouth. "Only   
if you take yours off."

"You first." Blake's hands slid under the white t-shirt   
again, enjoying the feeling of soft skin covering hard   
muscle. "I'll even help."

A crooked smile crossed his lover's face as Adam   
gripped the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his   
head. Blake's eyes greedily took in every inch of him.   
He'd seen the pictures in magazines. Hell, he'd even   
went looking for them these past couple of lonely   
months. But they didn't do the real thing justice. Or   
allow him to touch the beautiful body his eyes were   
feasting on. 

"You're fuckin' perfect." He purred, his hands moving   
over the smooth skin on display in front of him. 

"Funny...I thought you were the perfect one." Adam   
replied, bending in to kiss Blake's neck. 

His lips were soft on his skin and the stubble tickled   
lightly. Blake felt his toes curl with happiness as his   
hands roamed up and down the other man's back. His cock   
was rock hard now, straining almost painfully against   
his jeans and begging for attention. 

Adam's fingers found the buttons to Blake's plaid shirt   
and started undoing them one by one. After two, he   
stopped the rock star's hands. "Uh...I don't look like   
you. I don't want you to be...you know...disappointed   
or anything."

"Blake..." Adam's face softened. "I think you're a very   
sexy guy. Don't doubt yourself so much." 

"Yeah, well, compared to this..." He ran his hands over   
Adam's hard pecs and flat stomach. 

"Stop." His lover's eyes seemed to darken a little. "I   
love you, Blake. That makes you the most beautiful   
person in the world to me. And if you doubt how sexy   
you are, spend a little time online. Women AND men all   
over the planet would love to sleep with you." 

Blake was about to counter they hadn't seen him naked,   
but he bit his tongue. Instead he released Adam's hands   
and watched the long fingers undo rest of the buttons   
in quick succession, not about to allow another   
interuption. He felt a little color touch his cheeks   
when the shirt was opened wide, revealing the start of   
man boobies and a spare tire, not rock hard muscles. 

Adam didn't seem to notice, though, by the way he ran   
his hands almost reverently over his skin. It felt so   
good to be touched by him that Blake was able to start   
relaxing. The soft lips found his neck again and   
lingered for a few minutes before moving down over his   
shoulders. 

"Shit..." Blake groaned. "More.." 

"Damn cowboy..." He chuckled and his fingers found   
their way down to Blake's jeans. Adam undid the top   
button and slipped his hand inside. "You're ready for   
the rodeo." 

Electricity shot up Blake's spine at Adam's touch. His   
fingers felt amazing stroking the hard length, pulling   
it free of his pants and boxers. He saw the admiration   
in the other man's eyes and smirked a little. At least   
this was one part of his body he didn't have to be self   
conscious about showing. 

"Fuck..." Adam kept running his hand over the erection   
before him smoothly. "I didn't know they made them this   
big in Oklahoma..." 

"If everything is bigger in Texas, it's fucking HUGE in   
Oklahoma." He grinned in return and pressed his hand   
against the bulge in the front of Adam's own jeans.   
"Feels like they make 'em pretty good sized in LA   
too..." 

He unzipped Adam's fly and slipped his hand inside,   
withdrawing the rock star's dick so he could get a good   
look at it. This was something he'd thought about a lot   
lately, and he was not the least bit disappointed. 

"Tell me if I...you know...don't do it right..." His   
fingers traced Adam's length almost shyly before   
curling his fist around it. 

Adam hissed and sped up his hand on Blake's cock.   
"No..no...that's really good...damn..."

"You too," Blake knew he wouldn't last long, a little   
shiver passing through his body when the slightly   
calloused pad of a thumb ran over the sensitive head of   
his penis. "Shit..." 

Leaning forward, Adam rested his head forehead against   
Blake's, his breathing coming quicker. "Damn   
Blake...just like that..." 

For several long moments the only sounds that filled   
the room were heavy breaths and little sounds of   
pleasure. Blake closed his eyes, focusing on how   
perfect the hand on him felt and how perfect Adam felt   
in his own hand. It reminded him vaguely of one of   
thing Ying Yanger things, they just fit together into   
something magical. 

"Ahh..Adam..." His hips snapped upward as pleasure   
crashed down hard on him from all sides, lifting   
several times into that wonderful touch. Then he gasped   
and stiffened, spilling over Adam's hand. 

Adam didn't seem to mind, or even notice, Blake noted   
when he opened his eyes. He wanted to go limp and enjoy   
the boneless feeling of release, but he wanted to make   
sure Adam could enjoy the same sensation first. His   
blue eyes fixed on the other man's handsome face,   
smiling a little when he saw the pleasure written   
there. 

Then the rock star gasped, thrusting into Blake's hand   
almost greedily. He stroked him faster, moving against   
the friction. The whimper of release was well worth his   
efforts, then he felt the wet warmth of Adam's release   
running down the back of his hand.

"Fuck man..." Adam groaned and dropped his head onto   
Blake's shoulder, curling into him. 

Blake buried his face into the other man's bare neck,   
breathing in his scent, hints of sweat, aftershave and   
something that was just pure Adam Levine. 

"If it's up to me...the evening is just startin'." 

***********

Adam hadn't meant for them to go all the way that   
night. He hadn't even expected them to go out on a   
date, let alone find themselves in a tangle on his bed   
in their underwear. Part of him had gone to the stuido   
that afternoon not expecting Blake to do anything out   
of the ordinary. He'd spent all morning stressing   
whether things could just be the same if he let the   
love thing drop, afraid his cowboy would let him down   
and completely break his heart. 

And then, somehow, everything had gone right. First the   
date, then the walk on the beach that was quickly   
followed by the encounter on the couch. After they'd   
cleaned themselves up a bit and had a beer, they'd   
ended up going back to the bedroom. And now...it looked   
like the thing he'd dreamed about for almost two years   
was about to happen. 

Once his shirt came off, Blake seemed to have no   
problems shedding his pants once they'd made it to the   
bed. Adam was always a fan of nudity himself, so he had   
no problems dropping all his clothes at the slightest   
invitation, a habit he was hoping would eventually rub   
off on his friend. 

"How do we do this?" Blake finally pulled back,   
breathless from kissing. "I mean...you haven't done   
this before either, right?" 

"Never." Adam chuckled nervously. "I made out with a   
couple guys, did a little touching, but what we did on   
the couch was more than I've ever done before with   
another guy...let alone this..." 

"You're beautiful.." He replied and rolled over on top   
of him, his big body almost pinning Adam to the bed.   
You wouldn't think that five inches and seventy five   
pounds would make that much difference, but it   
certainly did. It was a good feeling, though, having   
the weight of Blake on him. 

"You keep mentioning that." His cheeks reddened a bit,   
hands moving down to play with the waistband of the   
other man's boxers. "Well...one of us has to go   
first..." 

"Should we flip a coin?" Adam teased a little, though   
he was honestly just as nervous as Blake about the   
whole thing. It wasn't that he didn't want to do it, he   
was just a little worried about if it would hurt, what   
would it be like. Suddenly he had a feeling he   
understood how women felt the night they lost their   
virginity. 

"No." Blake looked into his eyes intensely. "You tell   
me which you'd prefer...being the ah, giver or the   
reciever?" 

Adam was touched, knowing that it must all still seem   
very strange to Blake that he was about to have sex   
with a man. "Blake..."

"Hey," He quieted Adam with a soft kiss. "I want to do   
this. I really do. I just want to make sure it's   
special. You know?" 

"I know." Adam nodded and smiled a little. "Why don't   
you let me go first? I mean, neither one of us have   
done this before, it's going to be awkward the first   
few times. But that doesn't make it less special." 

Blake smiled and kissed Adam again, pulling his   
underwear off and trailing his lips down his neck and   
stomach. Adam squirmed as the country singer's warm   
mouth engulfed his growing erection. 

"Damn..." He moaned, closing his eyes and tangling his   
fingers in Blake's messy gunmetal colored curls. "Oh   
Blake..." 

He was fully hard now and more than a little impressed   
that Blake was doing a pretty great job of giving head   
for his first time ever doing it. But Adam didn't want   
the evening to end there, so when he started feeling   
little shocks of electricity up his spine, he gently   
pushed Blake away.

"Wasn't I doing it right?" Blake raised an eyebrow. 

"I want us to come together." Adam bent down and kissed   
him. "Take off your boxers and get on your hands and   
knees." 

He turned away and went for the lube in the drawer next   
to the bed. Adam was fine with the idea of being the   
one penetrated first, but now he wanted to see if Blake   
was willling to go that far. Maybe it was a way of   
testing him, because having someone put it up your ass   
was decidedly more gay than doing the inserting   
yourself. After all, men put their dicks all sorts of   
places without giving it much thought. 

Blake was on his hands and knees when Adam turned back   
to him with the tube of KY in his hand. He admired the   
sight for a moment, from the broad shoulders to the   
large erection. He might not have been totally happy   
with his body, but Adam loved it. 

"I've wanted to do this for so long..." Adam admitted,   
moving behind him. He bent down and started kissing   
Blake's back. His free hand moved beneath, stroking the   
hard length lovingly. "I'll be nice and gentle, okay?"

"Okay," He panted back, pressing into the hand. "Your   
hands are so good..." 

Adam chuckled and took his hand away, squeezing lube   
onto his fingers before he started to stroke Blake's   
tight opening. The other man jumped slightly, obviously   
surprised at the sensation of being touched there. He   
kept his fingers gentle and slow, just barely pushing   
into the ring of muscle. 

"See? Not so bad..." He soothed, bending to kiss   
Blake's shoulder. "Are you doing okay?"

"Yeah...keep going." Blake nodded a little, wiggling a   
little. "It's kinda...nice."

He pushed his fingers inside of the other man very   
slowly, hearing the little gasp Blake gave. There was   
no protest, though, so Adam slowly withdrew his fingers   
before sliding them back in again. Soon he had a steady   
rhthym going, carefully stretching the muslce as he   
went. Finally he withdrew his fingers and got to his   
knees behind Blake. 

"Are you ready?" Adam paused, not wanting to make him   
do something he wasn't really up for. 

"I'm ready..." Blake fisted the comforter underneath   
them. "Just...go slow, okay? That thing is a hell of a   
lot bigger than your fingers." 

"Flattery will get you everywhere." He smirked. 

Adam concentrated on pushing inside of Blake with a   
painstaking slowness. Beneath him, the country star   
gave a soft gasp and a grunt. 

"You okay there?" He asked, stilling his hips about   
half of the way in. 

"Yeah...just told you...it's big." 

He pushed in rest of the way and then paused for a few   
moments to let Blake adjust to the sensation. Then he   
pulled back out very slowly. In again slowly. The   
slowness was maddening when Blake was so hot and tight   
around his cock, but Adam wanted it to be good for him.

"Ohhh..." Blake gave a soft moan. "Oh..wow..."

"Better than you thought?" Adam's voice was hopeful,   
his hips increasing the pace just a little. 

The man beneath him nodded in reply and slowly Adam   
kept working the pace up. His thrusts were hard,   
mindful not to hurt Blake, but as they got quicker they   
were both gasping and moaning now. He couldn't believe   
they were finally making love...and it was amazing. 

"Blake..." He groaned, reaching around to fist the   
other man's cock. "Shit...I'm close." 

"Go for it." Blake hissed through clenched teeth. "Keep   
going...don't stop..." 

Adam closed his eyes and concentrating on using his   
hand in tune in with his hips. Something low in his   
belly tensed and he cried out with pleasure. His   
thrusts got a bit harder now, as those last moments of   
intense delight before his release came. Then he was   
losing himself inside of Blake and feeling the hot   
warmth of Blake's own release a moment later. 

Breathing hard, Adam withdrew and collapsed onto the   
bed. Blake joined him with a hard thump, covered in   
sweat and panting, just how he'd always imagined. Only   
the reality was so much better. 

"You good?" He moved in and kissed Blake's forehead.

"I'm...better than good, actually." Blake chuckled in   
return, lifting his head to kiss Adam on the lips. "But   
I think I could use a little nap now."

Adam snuggled into Blake's side and closed his eyes,   
loving the feel of their skin pressed together. "You   
and me both, cowboy."


	6. Chapter Five

The next morning Blake woke up with the luxiorous   
feeling of skin against skin. He popped one eye open,   
saw the short, black hair and the tattoo on the back of   
the neck and closed it again. A smile of pure elation   
crossed his face as he tightened his grip on the man   
tucked against his chest. 

He could hardly believe that after one date he and Adam   
had went to bed together. Obviously that's what Blake   
had wanted, but he figured there would have to be a lot   
more proving going on before they would do anything   
physically. After all, Adam's luck in the romance   
department was about as good as Blake's...only some of   
his ex's had made nasty comments. 

Maybe he was lucky that way. His first wife had just   
gone back to being a small town school teacher and when   
Blake became more visiable because of "The Voice" she   
never came back with any comments. Miranda had wanted   
out of the marriage and he gave it to her without   
argument, so in a way he felt a bit entitled for her to   
not put shit out there about him. He certainly had no   
plans of doing that to her. Sometimes relationship   
didn't work out, being a prick about it didn't change   
anything except to make it worse. 

He felt Adam stir slightly against him and Blake kissed   
the round tattoo on the back of the rock star's neck,   
something he'd always wanted to do. "Morning..."

"MMmmm..." The other man grumbled and turned slightly   
to look over his shoulder at Blake. "Holy shit...it   
wasn't a dream."

"If you're dreaming about us doing it, would you please   
dream me down about thirty pounds?" Blake teased back   
and then turned serious. "That's what I thought at   
first too. Or that I'd done something stupid." 

Adam turned his arm so they were nose to nose. "Do you   
think this was something stupid?"

"Hell no!" Blake bent in and kissed him. "I meant,   
like, I picked up some girl 'cause I let the little   
head do the big head's thinking for it. Which I would   
never do in a relationship. All that shit in those   
papers about me cheating on Miranda was bullshit. But I   
mean...when you're just waking up to someone in your   
bed after four months..." 

"Blake," Adam rolled his eyes. "Technically, this is my   
bed you know." 

Blake kissed his nose. "When I wake up first thing, I   
don't even know what my name is, let alone where I am.   
But..I guess I'm trying to say is I love you and I   
don't want a fling...I want the real thing."

He had hoped after the night before Adam would realize   
that he wasn't looking for easy sex or a quick flame.   
Blake wanted a relationship with him. It was a big   
scary to realize if it got out it would likely kill his   
career, but it was worth taking the risk for him. Maybe   
he'd always have a place in country music, but   
eventually the big time stardom would fade and he would   
be alone. But there was still that cautiousness in   
those amazing hazel eyes. 

"I love you too," Adam whispered back. "I've always   
wanted the real thing..." 

"Then let's have it." Blake kissed him again, long and   
lingering.

Adam's hands were moving up Blake's chest, then back   
down to skim over his sides. It made Blake feel like a   
teenager again, when a simple touch could hold so much   
electricity. He didn't think it would be very long   
before he would be up for a little fun. How lucky for   
them they didn't need to be at the studio today.

"Can it be this easy? This simple?" Adam wondered   
aloud. "It just seems like everything fell right into   
place right away." 

"I'm not complaining." Blake smiled at him and   
shrugged. "Why does it have to be some big, complicated   
thing, Adam?" 

Adam's shoulders moved upwards in a gesture mirroring   
the one that Blake had just made. "It doesn't. I'm just   
saying...it happened so fast."

Blake felt a quiver of panic in his stomach. "Too   
fast?"

"Well, no, I don't think so..." 

"You don't think so?" He sighed and shook his head a   
little. "Adam...I love you. I know I agreed to prove   
it, and I'll keep proving it. For the rest of my life,   
if you let me. But you need to start believing that I   
want you. I want us. I want this. Why can't you just   
believe it?"

Adam closed his eyes for a moment. "I want to believe." 

"Then stop wanting to...and start doing it." Blake was   
starting to get annoyed. He realized walking out on him   
the first time Adam admitted his feelings had been a   
bad idea on his part, but he'd had a marriage falling   
apart and the fear of losing his best friend on his   
shoulders back then. Now he was completely free of   
those burdens, ready to recieve the love he'd been   
offered that night and ready to offer twice as much in   
return.

Adam didn't bother to say anything in response, instead   
he kissed Blake deeply and pulled him in close. That   
was much more in line with how Blake wanted to spend   
the morning. 

***********

When they woke up the second time, it was Adam pressed   
against Blake's broad, bare back. He didn't have that   
momentary worry of where he was or who he was with,   
which he refused to admit he'd felt right along with   
Blake the first time they had woken up that morning. He   
did wonder what time it was, and judging by the way the   
light was coming through the blinds he'd guess it was   
about noon or even later. 

Oh well. For being a rock star, Adam wasn't normally   
the sleep until noon type, but he didn't want to move   
away from the big, warm body he was cuddled against.   
Blake was snoring a little and it found it sort of   
charming. It wasn't that much worse than Frankie had   
been in her older years, and really Blake did remind   
him of a dog.

He wanted to believe that this was it for both of them   
and laying there like this, feeling how it right it   
felt deep down into the very marrow of his bones, he   
did believe. Adam knew he'd have to work through some   
insecurities, but Blake had never lied to him before. 

Even that night he walked out, he never said he wasn't   
interested or didn't love him, just that he couldn't do   
it at that point. But everything changed and now they   
really had a chance to make it.

Adam stretched a little and kissed Blake's bare   
shoulder, earning a sleepy noise from the other man but   
no signs of movement. He chuckled and slipped out of   
bed, heading into the bathroom. When he returned   
Blake's eyes were open, watching him.

"I'm glad to see the fact we screwed each other   
senseless in every sense of the word now hasn't given   
you any hang ups about nudity." The country star   
drawled with a slight smirk.

"Oh shut up, cowboy." He chuckled and sat back down on   
the bed. "I'm starving...aren't you?"

Blake snorted. "I'm always starving."

"I can make eggs...and eggs." Adam bit his lip. "Or we   
can go out for breakfast."

"You can only cook eggs?" He raised an eyebrow,   
propping his head up on one elbow. "You better start   
keeping some stuff in the house that I can cook, then." 

Adam smiled a little, liking the way that sounded so   
cozy and homey. "Yeah...I could do that." 

"I think we should go out," He stretched and yawned.   
"Too damn late really for eggs. It's gotta be well past   
noon. Not that it wasn't the best damn sleep in I've   
had in a long time." He winked at Adam. 

"There's a deli not too far from here. They have a   
little of everything." 

"Works for me." Blake stood up and kissed Adam. "I call   
the shower first..." 

Adam rolled his eyes and let him take it. As he waited   
for the shower to free up, he did some yoga on the mat   
on the balcony outside the master bedroom. When Blake   
returned, his hair was slicked down from water and Adam   
had to admit he liked the sight. 

"Sexy," He chuckled. "Too bad I'm too hungry for any   
more fun."

"You're walking a bit funny too." Blake teased him   
affectionately. "I tried to be gentle, but you know..."

"Yeah, yeah, you're the biggest gun in town." Adam shot   
back. "And you aren't exactly walking normal either,   
buddy."

He walked in the bathroom and closed the bathroom door   
behind him, content to let Blake chew on that for a   
bit. His shower was fast, and he walked out sans towel,   
giving his friend a nice view while he went to the   
closet and pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.

"Ready to rock?" He asked Blake, who was struggling   
with his hair. 

"Um...yeah." The older man glanced into the mirror over   
the dressing. "Can never do my damn hair right..."

"Gimme." Adam took the brush from Blake and stood on   
tip toe to attempt to soothe the tangle of thick,   
greying chocolate hair into something at least halfway   
decent looking. "There."

Blake looked at him and chuckled, then glanced in the   
mirror. "Much better. Let's go." 

As they walked out of the house, Adam was surprised   
when Blake reached out and took his hand. He glanced   
over at the other man as his hand closed over the big   
one holding his own. 

"You realize if we do this in public..." He began   
slowly. 

"We'll be careful." Blake reassured him. "No one's said   
anything so far. The bromance, remember?"

Adam nodded. "But we'll have to be careful anyway. I'm   
not sure....I don't want you to lose your career,   
Blake. No one's going to care if I'm with another man.   
A lot of people think I'm gay or have figured out I'm   
bi already. But you..." 

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." He   
shrugged in return. "Right now...I just want to be glad   
I'm with you. Finally, really with you. Let's just   
focus on that." 

They stopped at the driver's side door to the corvette   
and Adam laughed a little. "Going to help me drive?"

"Not this little matchbox car. Though I admit, it is   
pretty hot." Blake bent down and kissed him softly.   
"But so are you..." 

Laughing, Adam slipped behind the Vette's wheel.   
Suddenly it seemed like everything was going to be   
okay. They were going to make it and nothing could stop   
them now. Maybe, just maybe, the hardest part was over   
and it could only go up from this day forward into their   
future together. It sure seemed like that when Blake   
got into the passenger seat and flashed him that   
brilliant smile, complete with a dimple on each side. 

However much Adam wasn't thinking about the possibility   
anything could go wrong, that there is an old saying his   
mother was fond of...men plan, God laughs. Today it   
didn't even cross his mind, but soon enough it would.


	7. Chapter 7

The next three weeks were the best Blake had   
experienced in almost a year. Whenever they weren't   
working for things on The Voice or were off doing   
things for their own careers, he and Adam were   
together. There was a lot of sex, like in any new   
realtionship, but they also had a lot of quiet moments   
just enjoying the fact it was okay to express what they   
both had been hiding for some time. 

That morning they were comfortably sprawled in a tangle   
of arms and legs on Adam's bed. The bed in Blake's   
rented house had seen no sleep or really anything else   
in it so far, both of them preferring to be together as   
much as possible. It had been scary to each to think   
they'd lost their best friend and the person they loved   
so much. That was definitely worth a lot of quality   
time together, and that went for double in Blake's   
book. 

"I can't believe we both have a whole day off..." He   
mused, tracing the lines of Adam's tattoos lightly with   
his finger. 

"I think that should qualify as a miracle." Adam   
chuckled and shifted slightly, resting his head against   
Blake's broad shoulder. "I think we should stay in bed   
all day."

Blake smiled a little, reclining against the pillows   
with a content sigh. "Well it is Sunday...day of   
rest..."

"Well, not too much rest." Adam lifted his head, his   
dark eyes full of impish delight. 

"Damn, you rock stars are insaitiable..." He rolled his   
eyes with a mock groan. "I hope you love me for more   
than just my amazing manhood."

"Of course I do," The rock star yawned in return. "But   
that is one of my favorite parts of your body."

"One of?" Blake raised an eyebrow. "What are the   
others?" 

Adam turned and changed his position so he was hovering   
over Blake. The impish gleam in his dark eyes was   
starting to turn lustful and Blake felt a tingle go   
down his spine. Usually there was a lot of sex at the   
start of any new relationship, but the amount they were   
having was borderlining on ridiculous. Not that he was   
complaining. At all.

"Well, your eyes have to be on the list. You have   
amazingly beautiful eyes." He licked his lips, studying   
Blake's face. "And your lips...because they're soft   
and-"

Blake's phone cut off Adam's praise session and he was   
inclined to ignore it. Then thirty seconds later,   
Adam's phone went off too. That was strange enough to   
get him to grab his own phone, which was still ringing.

"'Lo?" He tried not to sound too sleepy to the caller   
on the other line. 

Carson Daly's voice was on the other end of the line.   
""Listen, Blake...it's out, man." About you and Adam, I   
mean. I got some advanced copies of this week's   
tabloids for a bit on Last Call...they've got pictures   
and everything." 

Blake swallowed hard, feeling a bit dizzy with the   
news. It wasn't that he ashamed to be in love with   
Adam, but being in country music made it more difficult   
to be open that he was in a relationship with another   
man. Especially not when he'd been married twice before   
to women...one of them being a huge country star in her   
own right. 

"Blake? Are you there?" Carson's voice was heavy with   
concern. "Listen, this isn't going to change anything   
with the show. I am going to absolutely make sure of   
that. Hell, we hyped the bromance from the beginning,   
we're not going to turn our backs on you guys now." 

"Thanks," He managed to get a word out, and somehow   
that seemed to loosen his jaw enough to talk. "It's   
only really been a thing for a month now...I'm kind of   
surprised word got out so fast. Fucking paparazzi and   
their fucking telefotos." 

"Yeah. But I'm glad you guys finally hooked up. I mean,   
I knew there was some major chemistry going on from the   
beginning. Anyone who couldn't see it was blind." He   
chuckled a little. "Though if it's only been a month,   
it must've taken you two the longest of everyone to   
figure it out." 

Blake closed his eyes for a moment, thinking. "Well, I   
was married. As much as the National Enquirer wants to   
believe I'm a cheater, I'm not. And...I'm glad we did   
too. Even if we're about to get a shitstorm." 

"I know. But don't forget you have friends that will   
back you up. Both you and Adam." 

"Thanks," He had to work to sound grateful. "I'll talk   
to you later, okay? I'd prefer to tell Adam myself." 

When Blake hung up the phone, Adam was already done   
talking and scrolling on his smart phone, the same look   
of worry on his face. 

"You don't have to tell Adam anything," He sighed and   
glanced up at Blake. "That was Jesse, he saw something   
on twitter and wanted to give me a heads up. A picture   
popped up yesterday, I guess, last night, or something   
like that. Within the last twenty-four hours." 

Blake nodded slowly. "Well, I'm glad the picture got   
leaked. Maybe the rag mags won't make as much money off   
the stories Carson said they have prepared for this   
week. Bastards. They can't just let people's lives be   
decent!" 

Adam set down his phone and stared out into the space,   
his expression sad. "Been more than decent...it's been   
amazing." 

"It has been." He looked over at his boyfriend, not   
liking the grief etched into his beautiful face. It was   
going to be a rough few months and they would likely   
lose some fans and viewers over it, but hopefully more   
people would stick behind them. Though his career in   
country music was probably about over now. 

Blake leaned back against the headboard and sighed   
heavily. "We knew this was going to happen eventually.   
It's hard to hide something like this for too long with   
us both being single now and everyone looking. The   
show'll stick by us, Carson said he'd make sure of it."

"And your career?" Adam asked him in a quiet voice. "It   
didn't make a difference when it came out about Mick   
Jagger and David Bowie, but that's rock music. It's not   
the same with country...and people are already pissed   
about you and Miranda getting divorced..." 

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." He   
shrugged. "Can't put the cat back in the bag, Adam.   
It's out and we gotta deal with it." 

The other man nodded a little and looked down at the   
comforter pooled around their waists, picking at some   
invisible lint balls. "Could always say it was a fling,   
a mistake. Then you could maybe redeem your image. Or   
you could deny it." 

"They've got pictures, Adam." Blake felt anger well up   
inside of him. "And is that what you really want? To   
pretend this past month didn't happen? Or the three   
years of wanting each other before that? Laugh it off   
and deny everything?"

"No, that's not what I want." Adam sounded equally   
aggravated. "But what are we supposed to do, Blake? I   
know how much you love what you do. And don't tell me   
you aren't thinking about your career..." 

He stood up and reached for his jeans. "Of course I'm   
thinking about my career. But I already thought of that   
a month ago, before we hooked up. I knew the risks   
coming into it." 

It wasn't his career at all Blake was thinking about,   
it was the hurt rising up in him. He couldn't believe   
that Adam's reaction was to try to deny it. Or chalk it   
up as a fling. Did that mean he wanted to end the   
relationship? It wouldn't harm Adam's career, so why   
was he so willing to walk out of the door? 

"I was willing to risk everything." He turned back to   
Adam, the hurt very obvious in his eyes. "And now you   
want to just call it a mistake."

"Blake.." Adam paled. "I wasn't saying I thought it was   
a mistake...but I thought...your career..."

"FUCK my career." Blake snapped in return. "Who gives a   
shit if you're on the top of the charts if you're going   
to bed every night alone. Careers come and go, love is   
supposed to last forever." 

Adam got off the bed too and went to Blake, his eyes   
pleading. "I didn't say it wouldn't. Blake..."

"No.." Blake pulled away from Adam and shook his head.   
"You might not have said it, but when your first   
thought is to just cut and run...that hurts, Adam." 

"Blake..." He shook his head. "I just...I don't want to   
be selfish. I want to do what's right for you."

"And you think us breakin' up is what's right for me?"   
A lump formed in Blake's throat, feeling grief weight   
down heavily on him. He reached for his t-shirt and   
pulled it over his head. Then he grabbed his boots and   
crammed them onto his feet, hands shaking slightly.

"Where are you going?" Adam was already dressing   
hurriedly. 

"I need some air." 

Once his boots were on his feet he grabbed his wallet   
and car keys off the dresser. He felt like screaming,   
crying, putting his fist throught he wall, but he did   
none of those things. None of that would change things.

"Don't go," A small voice pleaded from behind him. 

Blake turned and looked at his partner, at the man he   
loved. There was as much pain and grief written on his   
face as he felt inside of himself. He opened his mouth   
to speak, but the words seemed to choke up inside of   
him again. 

"I didn't want to make you choose between being with me   
or your career." Adam continued, crossing the room   
until they were standing only inches apart. 

This time Blake didn't move away. He reached up and ran   
his hand softly over Adam's cheek. A single tear fell   
and he brushed it away tenderly with his thumb. The   
last thing he'd ever want to do was hurt Adam. And he   
had to believe that Adam felt the same way about him.   
But the words spoken couldn't quite leave his mind. 

"I already made that choice. I don't know how you can't   
see that." 

And with that, Blake turned around and walked out of   
the bedroom. He paused a moment at the front door, then   
decided he really did need to clear his head. So he   
left the house he was starting to think of as home and   
hopped in his pick up, heading for the hills. Nothing   
healed your soul like God's country.

 

**************

Adam couldn't believe Blake had just left like that. He   
tried to muster up some outrage about how he'd been   
wronged, but each time he came to the fact he'd said   
exactly the worst thing possibility. It didn't matter   
if he was trying not to be selfish or force Blake into   
a relationship, he had said absolutely the wrong thing   
and it was very hard for him to feel sorry for himself   
with that fact so clear in his mind. 

He had fucked up with a capital F and he wondered why   
he'd done that. Adam could be very impulsive and it had   
ran more than a few relationships into the ground over   
the years. Some might even say he suffered from some   
self destructive tendencies.

He'd only been in a relationship with Blake for a   
month, but he already knew he was more in love than   
he'd ever been before. As wonderful as it was, it   
scared him too. If Blake left him, he wouldn't be able   
to survive. And then somehow he'd made that happen   
anyway. 

Adam miserably slumped down on the couch and put his   
head in his hands. He wanted Blake to come back so he   
could explain that he was afraid that if he forced   
Blake into revealing their relationship so soon, he   
would get resentful and they would ultimately fail.   
Every relationship he'd been in had failed. Technically   
the same could be said for Blake, but he knew that it   
was a different kind of failure. 

Even more so, he was afraid if he told Blake he wanted   
to write it in the sky that they were in love and   
happy together, he would just up and run. He didn't   
doubt that Blake loved him, but Adam knew that he'd   
been raised in a different place where the sort of   
relationship they had was looked down upon. Not to   
mention country music didn't have any openly gay   
singers, let alone a man who'd been married to two   
women and now was in a relationship with his very male   
best friend. 

Blake's music meant so much to him and it was hard for   
Adam to believe someone...not just Blake, but anyone in   
the whole world...could love him more than what they   
seemed to be put on this earth for. Despite the   
Grammys, the hit songs, the model girlfriends, the   
millions of dollars, the sex status there was still a   
lot of insecurity in Adam. But for all his   
independence, he also wanted to be loved so intensely   
it sometimes made him a bit neurotic and clingly in   
relationships. 

Adam rested his forehead on his knees and took a deep,   
shuddering breath. He had been the one to demand that   
Blake prove his intentions, and maybe he'd thrown it   
back into his face when his first suggestion was to   
deny the relationship or write it off as a mistake. 

Granted, he meant that for the media, but he just as   
well had said it was all together. Blake was no doubt   
scared about his career and how his life would change,   
and Adam had just basically told him it was all for   
naught. 

Now he did start crying silently, his shoulders shaking   
lightly. What if Blake didn't come back? What if he'd   
lost the best thing in his life? And now, it was going   
to come out no matter what either of them did. If they   
weren't together, they might have lost everything else   
that mattered...and the thing that mattered most of   
all. 

Adam wasn't sure how long he had cried, but at some   
point he ended up stretched out on the couch. Soon   
sleep overtook him. He wasn't sure how long he dozed,   
but when he woke up Blake was sitting on the floor next   
to the couch.

"Blake?" He whispered, not sure whether to be elated or   
terrified. Would he say he was leaving for good? Had he   
come back? Or could it even be a dream?

"You look like hell." Blake pointed out and leaned into   
press a kiss against his forehead.

Adam couldn't help but smile weakly at that. "Do I?"

"You've been crying. Your eyes are all red and puffy."   
His fingers touched lightly under Adam's eyes. "I'm   
sorry. I shouldn't...I shouldn't have stormed out like   
that." 

That was all Adam needed to hear. He reached over and   
wrapped his arms around Blake's neck tightly, pulling   
him as close as he could get. The other man embraced   
him in return. And for a long while, they just sat   
there holding each other. 

Finally Blake had to move because he was getting a   
cramp in his neck. As he pulled back and resettled   
himself on the couch next to Adam, the rock star took a   
moment to collect his thoughts.

"I should explain..." He began slowly. "I don't think   
us getting together is a mistake. If I put everything I   
ever did in order of how much a mistake it had   
been...this would be at the top of the list as the   
least mistake I've ever made." 

Blake frowned slightly, obviously thinking it over, so   
Adam quickly explained. "It wasn't a mistake. It's the   
best decision I ever made, being with you."

"Oh," The country singer gave a slight, sheepish smile.   
"Keep in mind, I'm a dumb hillbilly. Don't get too   
metaphorical on me." 

"You don't have a dumb bone in your body," Adam   
countered, then continued. "And I don't want you to ay   
it was a mistake or a fling...because it's neither of   
those things for me."

"Then why did you say that's what I should say? That   
was like the first thing out of your mouth. Deny it.   
Call it a mistake or a fling if they have pictures to   
prove it."

Adam took a deep breath. "Because I don't..I'm afraid   
of forcing this on you. And I didn't want you to make   
that choice between-" 

"But I told you I already did." Blake cut him off. 

"Yes," He agreed. "And I think I've known what that   
choice was, it just scared me. To think someone could   
love me so much to give up everything that was   
important to them." 

Blake shrugged slightly and took Adam's hand in both of   
his, looking down at it thoughtfully. "I don't know how   
else to love. Either you're in or you're out. I can't   
do it by halves." 

"I've never had that before. Sometimes it's hard to   
believe I deserve it." Adam sighed and lowered his eyes   
to their joined hands too, his fingers wrapping around   
Blake's. "I don't want to be selfish."

"But what do you want?" Blake lifted his eyes and   
peered at Adam so intensely he had to bring his gaze up   
to those beautiful blue eyes after a few moments so he   
didn't feel like lasers were boring into him. Though   
perhaps they were, right into his soul, wanting to hear   
his darkest desires.

"I want to love you." Adam admitted softly. "I want to   
be with you until we're two old wrinkled bastards on   
the porch in rocking chairs complaining about   
disrespectful kids. And I don't want to have to hide   
how I feel about you. I went through three years of   
that...and it's terrible to have to question if every   
hug, every kiss, every word might release the genie   
from the bottle..." 

Blake looked at him a long time, then leaned in and   
kissed his lips softly. It was quite different from the   
first time they kissed, this time it was so tender it   
brought tears to Adam's already red eyes and threatened   
to break his heart. How could he have ever doubted that   
Blake would choose them over anything else?

"Okay, we want the same things then." Blake smiled a   
little when he finally pulled back. "But I was talking   
about, what do you want to do about it coming out? And   
for real, not what you think you should say because   
you're afraid of scaring me off..."

Adam blinked, slightly surprised that Blake had picked   
up on that. "Was it that obvious?"

"After I took some time to think about it, yeah, it   
was." He shrugged. "I can't say I wouldn't worry about   
the same thing, if it was switched. I know you probably   
think because I'm from Oklahoma and in country music   
and a redneck, that being with you is something   
unnatural I have to get used to bit by bit." 

He turned those intense blue eyes onto him again,   
though they'd softened some now that things were going   
better. "But it's not, Adam. Being with you is as   
natural as breathing to me. I don't care if you're a   
guy...you're MY guy and I love you." 

"I think...we should come out with it. Make some sort   
of statement." Adam thought a moment. "Tomorrow   
morning, maybe? Just think of the ratings it'll bring   
the show, doing it on the morning of an episode." 

Blake nodded slowly. "We don't even need it to be a   
formal statement, you know. Carson said he'd make sure   
the show stands behind us. You'll be fine, rock stars   
are expected to do shocking things, and quiet  
honestly a lot of people have always questioned whether   
you're gay or not..." 

"Because I sing like a girl?" Adam smirked slightly,   
then shrugged. "I consider myself bisexual. Always   
have, always will. I just happened to find my soulmate   
in another man." 

"Me too. Though I don't think the country music folks   
are going to give two fucks whether I have a soulmate   
or not. Because country singers have an image too. But   
they aren't going to give two shits whether they read   
it in a rag mag or see a tweet or a press confrence." 

Adam nodded slowly. "I'm sorry if this fucks up your   
career, Blake." 

"Yeah, well, I knew it would slow down eventually." He   
shrugged. "And I'm not exactly hangin' up my guitar   
yet. If Nashville won't have me, I'll figure out my own   
way to keep making music. It's part of me. But you're   
part of me too now. And as great as fame is, these last   
four months have reminded me that it doesn't do a damn   
thing if you're alone with no one to share the perks   
with, you know?"

"I do know," Adam smiled a little and put his arm   
around Blake. "So what were you thinking?"

"Go wash your face and get your laptop..." Blake had a   
slight impish look in his eyes. "There might be a   
picture circulating, but we have rights to make the   
actual announcement ourselves, don't you think? Teach   
those fuckers to try to make a story off of us." 

He couldn't help but laugh a little. "You're sure you   
don't want to just let our PR people release a short,   
tasteful statement?"

Blake fixed him with a mock disgusted look. "Adam, when   
have I ever done anything tasteful in my whole damn   
life?" 

Laughing, Adam hopped off the couch and went to grab   
the computer. As he climbed up the steps, he felt light   
and free. Maybe it was worth a few tears if it lead to   
something even better once they were dried.


	8. Chapter 8

"I'm Blake Shelton..."

"And I'm Adam Levine..." 

They were doing this completely off the cuff. No   
script, no cameraman but the webcam eye of Adam's   
laptop. And maybe it was better this way, because this   
was one of the most personal announcements they would   
make in their entire lives. 

"So, ya'll might have heard about a picture going   
around the internet of us." Blake looked at Adam, a   
slight smile crossing his face before he looked back   
into the webcam. "And Adam and I are here to tell you   
that it's completely true."

Across the couch, Blake took Adam's hand and looked at   
the other man, giving him a chance to talk. 

"Blake and I have never hid the fact we felt affection   
for each other, but it's always been behind a banner of   
bromance. But we've graduated to just plain romance   
now." Adam looked at Blake a sec, biting his lip. "I   
think it's very important for everyone to know, even   
though we became attracted to each other shortly after   
we met, nothing went on until after Blake was   
divorced." 

"And now, we just want everyone to know, yes, we're   
together." Blake squeezed Adam's hand. "We're in love.   
I know it might be hard for some of you to understand   
that, and ya'll are entitled to your opinions. But   
we're in love and we're not going to hide the   
relationship any longer." 

"So we hope our fans will support us." Adam finished,   
trying to find the right words. "But if they feel they   
can't, then at least respect our right to be happy and   
with the person we love." 

Blake smiled and turned to Adam. "I think that's it. I   
can't think of a better way to put it." He hugged Adam,   
feeling a sudden surge of relief that it was over. "Can   
you edit it to end right after what you said?"

"Oh yeah," Adam picked up the computer and tapped away.  
He was much better at that sort of thing than Blake, so   
the country singer was content to go to the kitchen and   
get them each a beer. It was a risky move, putting it   
all out there like that, but if it was going to come   
out anyway, they deserved to do it their way. And he   
did love the idea of stealing the big scoop away from   
the tabloids. 

When he came back into the room, Adam was staring at   
the computer. His dark eyes found Blake's over the top   
of the laptop's screen and held them for a few seconds. 

"Are you ready to do this? Once I hit this key...we   
can't take this back, Blake." 

"I am completely ready." Blake sat down next to Adam   
and kissed him soundly on the mouth. "I want to get   
this over with...and go back to just..being with you.   
Plus this is our announcement...not the fucking   
tabloids."

Adam nodded a little and smiled. "Alright." He clicked   
on the mouse a couple of times and set the laptop back   
on the coffee table. "There. It's done. We're out."

"Thank God," Blake handed the other man the other can   
of beer. "A toast?" 

"To?" Adam held up his can. 

"Us, you dummy," Blake shook his head a little, then   
raised his beer can. "To us...for good." 

"For good?" He raised an eyebrow in return, and it made   
Blake laugh out loud.

"Yeah...for good." The country singer paused a moment,   
feeling a sort of odd sensation of vulnerability swim   
up inside of him. "I mean...this is it. I want to be   
with you. And only you. For good. Til' we're both old   
men pushing ninety and ready to be worm food." 

"I don't think worms are into pickled redneck," Adam   
teased, then he clinked his beer can against Blake's.   
"And you better live to be nearly ninety. I'm going to   
hold you to that."

Blake chuckled and pulled Adam in close. "And if I   
don't, what exactly are you going to do, hmm?" 

"I don't even want to think about that," He wrapped his   
arms around Blake and burrowed his head into his   
shoulder. "I love you. I haven't loved anyone like this   
before, and no one's loved me enough to give up   
everything to be with me." 

"We don't know that everything is going to fall apart."   
Blake kissed the top of Adam's head. "But even if it   
did, if I still have you, it's going to be alright.   
This is the thing that matters most in life." 

*********

Once the video went up, they'd agreed to turn off their   
phones nad not check messages until the next morning.   
They deserved that much, for half a day of privacy   
before everyone in the world was going to weigh in with   
their opinion. Not just their family and friends, who   
for the most part didn't know about their relationship,   
but everyone who heard the story. There was little   
doubt what story people would be hearing over their   
Monday morning coffee. 

Their own phones didn't go back until after they'd had   
a chance to have coffee and a decent breakfast. They   
were together and they were resolved to stay together   
no matter how hard it got, but there was a kind of   
nervous anticipation in the air. Adam was having a lot   
of trouble sitting still and he was thankful that Blake   
seemed to understand his need to flit around. 

Once the phones were on, it took less than five minutes   
for the ringing to start. Adam didn't get a chance to   
speak more than three sentences in a row to Blake again   
until it was time to leave for the studio. Everyone   
wanted to get their words in. His mother wanted him to   
know she would always love him anyway, his brother was   
surprised but oddly amused, Jesse had known all along   
without being told, and his manager gave him a twenty   
minute lecture about why they had a press manager and   
why it was important to run everything by him first. 

"Fuck, my ear is numb." Adam shook his head a little as   
they headed out to his Porsche. They had no reason not   
to drive in to the studio together now. 

"You're tellin' me." Blake sighed, looking like the   
weight of the world was on his shoulders. 

"Some bad calls?" He reached over and put his hand on   
Blake's knee once they were going down the street,   
giving it a supportive squeeze. 

"Well, my record label is threatening to drop me." The   
country singer frowned. "I'll give my lawyer a call   
tomorrow morning and see what he can do about it. I   
don't care if they want to produce another of my   
albums, but we had a contract and they're not getting   
out of it. Not for this reason. It's bullshit."

"I'm sorry," Adam couldn't seem to come up with   
adequete words for what he was feeling. 

"Don't," He took the hand off of his knee and pressed   
his lips to it. "The only thing I'm sorry for is that   
some people are such ignorant assholes." 

Adam gave Blake a little smile and reached up to stroke   
the side of his scruffy face at the stop light. "It's   
going to be okay, one way or another. I might have an   
idea already...for you to keep making music, even if   
your label drops you." 

"Tell me about it after the show." Blake smiled a   
little as they pulled into the studio parking lot. "I   
think it's going to be a bit crazy on set today."

Blake turned out to be right and Adam barely had a   
chance to get fidgety with all the running around they   
were doing getting ready for another live show. He   
loved that about being on The Voice, it was a non stop   
rush the days of the shows. He loved being busy, he   
loved bouncing around from thing to thing, making sure   
his artists were ready, making sure he was ready,   
chatting with the other coaches and Carson and the   
crew. 

The only change from the normal chaos was a meeting   
with the producers where they agreed with Carson's   
assurances the day before, that the show would stand   
behind Blake and Adam. It was a bit contradictory to   
the values of a couple of the producers, but they had   
cashed in quite a bit on the bromance. So, as long as   
the boys didn't do anything to get them in trouble with   
the FCC, they would be part of the show as long as they   
wanted. 

"Well, fuck Mark, my damn mouth is probably a bigger   
threat to that whole FCC thing." Blake drawled, much to   
everyone's amusement. 

And then everything was back to organized chaos. Before   
Adam knew it he was taking his chair at the end of the   
row. He gave Blake a big hug when the judges were   
introduced and pecked him on the cheek, earning a truly   
wild, huge cheer from the crowd. And then it was   
business as usual. 

Their relationship and the photograph wasn't mentioned   
during the next two hours. They just did their thing   
like nothing had changed at all and that felt good. Of   
course, Adam and Blake still jabbed at each other and   
bickered like an old married couple. That would never   
change. And it was so nice to know that at the end of   
the day he would be taking the smart mouthed cowboy   
home with him. 

After the show and the hubub that always followed,   
Blake and Adam were finally alone again. They got into   
the car and glanced at each other, then cracked up   
laughing. It was just like the old days, talking about   
their performances, what they could do to help their   
arists. The only difference was Blake's hand on his   
knee and the fact they were heading back to his house   
together. 

Once they were there, Adam couldn't hold it back any   
longer. "So, I had a radical idea. I had to make a   
couple of phone calls, but everyone agreed it would   
work." 

"Work for what?" Blake stretched out on the couch. 

"You making music." He replied in a 'duh' tone of   
voice. "So you can keep making music no matter   
what...and making the music you love." 

"Alright, let's hear it."

Adam was obviously excited, gesturing with his hands   
and barely sitting still in his seat. "I'm surprised we   
didn't think of it right away. I mean, my label isn't   
big, but we could help...." 

"You want to sign me?" Blake's eyebrows shot up in   
surprised. 

"No. It's going to get even better." Adam was ready to   
start bouncing. "Most song and album sales are digital,   
right? So why not, like, release your music that way? I   
know a lot of your fans are going to support you,   
Blake. So my label will make sure you get the studio   
time and the people to work on your music. Then you can   
relase it yourself...be completely in control of it. You'll be revolutionary."

Blake looked at him for a good long time, then he started laughing again, that big, booming laugh Adam loved so much. "You know. I think that just might work...you're a fucking genius, Adam." 

"Not the first time I heard it." He laughed and passed Blake a bottle of beer. "But it also doesn't hurt that love moves you to do great things."

Blake raised his bottle of beer. "I'll drink to that!"


	9. Chapter 9

Even in the face of earth shattering announcements, the type that made everyone rethink everything they   
knew about you, life had a way of moving on. It did for Blake and Adam, who were soon caught up in the   
intense cycle of the final four weeks on the current season of The Voice, not to mention their own music   
careers. But Blake ended up staying at Adam's house full time, so the evenings, even when they didn't get   
free until ten o' clock at night or midnight, were for them to be together. Even though they'd been   
friends for so long, they were getting to know each other as lovers and partners, and it was an exciting   
journey for them both. 

Being without a label had brought about one change in Blake he was glad to see...he was starting to write   
more of his own music. In the time they had off, he could he found sitting in Adam's back yard, soaking   
up the warmth and the view of the mountains as he strummed at his guitar and wrote into a notebook. It   
was beautiful in early summer and he found himself starting to really like the hills around Los Angeles.   
He and Adam took long hikes on the weekends, stopping to eat at the scenic points. When he'd first gotten   
involved with The Voice, Blake had hated LA. But now he was starting to feel pretty at home there. 

In some ways it seemed like the next month passed over night, and in other ways it seemed to take   
forever. Either way, they were getting ready to leave for the studio the morning of the final performance   
show of the season when the question of where they went from there first came up. 

"I can't believe the season is over already," Adam shook his head a little, watching out the kitchen   
window as he sipped on his coffee. 

Blake got up from his seat and wrapped his arms around Adam's waist, his chin resting on the other man's   
shoulder. "Seems like it's been forever to me. Or maybe because so much has change. I mean, in ten   
weeks...everything's changed." 

"For the better?" He turned his head towards Blake's nuzzling his cheek against his. 

"The best," Blake reassured him, nuzzling him back. His lips grazed the other man's neck and he sighed   
contently, breathing in the scent of his lover. The best scent in the world to him. Everything was the   
best when it was with Adam, even when they were fighting. And that told him all he needed to know about   
their future together. 

"Blake...what now?" Adam asked, not completely submitting to the seduction Blake was attempting to   
perform on him, which was a bit frusterating.

"Well, I'm tryin' to get you into bed, if you can't tell..." 

Adam chuckled and set down his coffee cup. Then he turned to Blake and kissed him passionately on the   
mouth. Blake was only too eager to pull him into a tight embrace, kissing the other man until they were   
both breathless. He could feel himself starting to respond and Adam wasn't far behind judging by the   
bulge starting to poke him in the thigh. Gently he steered his rock star towards the bedroom, totally   
bent on enjoying him before they had to compete with each other on the show. 

"But I mean, after tomorrow, Wednesday...really...considering how smashed we always manage to get after   
the finale parties..." Adam began as they tumbled onto the bed together. "What then?" 

Blake was already starting to feel the benefit of a little blood loss to the brain, but he could also   
tell this question was bothering Adam. "Well, I don't know. Why does anything have to happen? We're   
happy...we can finally be out in the open. Your band is going to start working on a new album, I've been   
writing songs for the first time in a long time....it seems like everything is going good."

"But where are you going to be?" Adam asked him, nuzzling his neck in a way that was deliciously   
distracting. 

Oh that's what he was asking about, and it was actually a good question. Blake had no idea where he was   
going to go, though he knew he didn't have a hankering to leave Adam's side. He still had his ranch in   
Oklahoma and he missed being there, but at some point he'd have to decide where he belonged, and those   
roads kept leading back to Adam. 

"I wouldn't mind going back to Oklahoma for awhile...recharge a bit after all we've been through...but   
after that..." Blake considered it for a moment, then shrugged. "I want to be with you." 

He claimed Adam's mouth again, kissing the other man deeply and working his hands under his shirt. Adam's   
skin was warm and smooth, the muscles beneath it hard and lean. He was a work of art and Blake felt   
really, really lucky that he was with someone so amazing. His boyfriend didn't seem to mind his body, but   
Blake knew that he was a bit soft around the middle. Though in recent weeks he had started to slim down   
again. 

Blake rolled over onto Adam, pinning him beneath him and pulling the distracting shirt off of the rock   
adonis before him. His mouth wandered the surprisingly strong shoulders and graceful neck, delighting in   
the little sounds the man beneath him was making.

"Blake..." Adam finally pushed him back lightly. "I gotta say something..." 

"It can't wait an hour?" Blake groaned, rubbing his hard on against Adam's thigh, hoping to make the   
other man forget about whatever he was thinking about that didn't involve sex at the moment. 

"No," He shivered a little, but reached up to stop Blake's movements. "Move in." 

"I was kind of angling towards that," Blake's hands went to the waistband of Adam's jeans, earning a   
laugh from the other man, who batted his hands away.

"No, you big idiot! Move in with me." 

That got Blake to stop his pursuit of sex for a moment. "You mean like, live here full time?" 

"Well, not full time here in LA, but with me full time, yeah." Adam nodded, looking apprehensive. "I   
mean, we could go back to Tishimingo as much as you want, whenever the schedules allow. And when I'm on   
tour, if you're not with me, you can be there too...but yeah...you know...where you go, I will go." 

"...where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God." Blake finished the   
verse from the book of Ruth for him. "Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried."

Adam smiled and stroked Blake's cheek softly. "Yeah...that's exactly what I had in mind." 

"I can't think of anything I want more," Blake said sincerely, kissing the other man deeply. 

 

******

 

Wednesday morning, as predicted, Adam woke up with a pretty serious hangover. This was quickly becoming a   
'Voice' finale tradition for him and basically every adult involved with the show even in the most   
marginal way. After the finale show came the official after party, then they would usually have another   
unoffical party, and if they could still speak in complete sentences, he and Blake would go back to   
Adam's to finish drinking themselves into obliteration. 

This was the first time, however, he'd woken up naked with Blake snoring away in his ear. The other man's   
heavy arm and leg pinned him down, though with the way Adam felt he wasn't in any hurry to get up. And   
the snoring was almost soothing, lulling him back to sleep after a few minutes. Or maybe it was the hang   
over. Either way, the second time Adam opened his eyes it was well into afternoon and Blake was sitting   
on the side of the bed, head in his hands.

"You okay there, Big Country?" He rolled onto his side to address the other man's broad, bare back. 

"Yeah," Blake groaned. "What the fuck did we do last night? I never get hang over headaches like this..."

"Carson played bartender. He thought it would be hilarious to start mixing random shit together." Adam   
joined Blake on the edge of the bed, rubbing his back supportively. "I don't feel quite as bad because I   
threw up after the third creation. You, on the other hand, must have a stomach of steel." 

Blake rubbed his head and lifted it to look at Adam. "I'm kinda wishing I didn't right about now. But   
since you're obviously not feeling like you liquified your brain last night, you can make the coffee." 

Adam rolled his eyes, but pressed a kiss to Blake's cheek. "Try taking a shower, then come downstairs. I   
have something for you." 

"Really?" He gave a little smile. "Strange, I have something for you too."

"That's exactly what you said last night," Adam laughed and shook his head. "But you feel asleep about   
five seconds later, so I never got to find out what it was." 

Adam had enough sense to scramble off the bed and be moving away from Blake when he said that, but the   
pillow just narrowly missed his head. He was laughing, though, enjoying that he could still fuck with   
Blake and the fact they were in a relationship now made it all the better. He was whistling to himself   
when he went downstairs and started the coffee. 

It took almost a half hour for Blake to show himself, but he seemed much more human by then. He had even   
dressed and run a comb through his hair. Adam greeted him by pressing a cup of coffee into his hands and   
a kiss to his forehead.

"Feeling better?"

"Mostly, yeah." He nodded and sipped on the coffee. "Mmmm, you do make good coffee. You are now the   
offical house coffee maker."

"No," Adam pointed to the machine sitting on the counter. "The Keruig is the offical house coffee maker.   
And we'll get one for the ranch too. Caffiene is essential to life."

Blake laughed a little. "Well, I'm glad we've got our priorites straight. So does that mean we're good to   
head to Tishimingo this weekend?" 

"Oh yeah," He nodded. "Three weeks of fishing, hunting, four wheelers, beer and torandoes. You know, I'm   
going to be a big wimp about the tornado thing at first. We don't get those that often here." 

"There's a great storm shelter at the ranch...we'll ride out a few warnings and then you'll be a pro."   
Blake smiled and settled in at the table with his coffee, watching Adam with those beautiful blue eyes of   
his, looking rather pleased with himself. "So...you wanna see what I have for you?"

"In the kitchen, Blake?" Adam raised an eyebrow teasingly. "I don't know, there's all sorts of sharp,   
pokey things and hot surfaces, we might end up in the emergency room with a lot of explaining to do." 

"Smart ass." He rolled his eyes and shook his head a little. "Believe it or not, not everything out of my   
mouth is about sex. Even if you do make it hard for it not to be." 

Adam took something out of the drawer and joined Blake at the table, setting down a small, flat box. "Can   
I go first?" He realized that if he was a dog, his tail would be wagging right about now, but he wanted   
to make Blake happy. Sliding the box across the table in front of the country singer, he smiled warmly. 

"Open it." 

Blake opened the box and withdrew a wooden keychain carved into the shape of a deer with a brand new key   
on it. "Did you steal an Oprah's idea?" 

Adam laughed and shook his head. "No, dummy, it's to the house. Because this is your home too now. No one   
else has a key except my mother. Until now." He cleared his throat lightly. "And there's ah, something   
else under the tissue paper." 

He blushed and looked down, not wanting to see Blake's reaction when he found the necklace he'd hidden in   
the bottom of the box. Adam hadn't been sure what his boyfriend would think of a ring so soon, so he put   
the silver band on a necklace, along with a charm of a little silver accoustic guitar. Engraved on the   
inside of the ring were two words: "This Love". One of Adam's songs, but one that meant a lot to their   
relationship. They'd been attracted to each other from their first meeting, but the first time there had   
been true electricity had been when Blake got up on "The Voice" staged and performed Adam's song. 

Blake wasn't saying anything now, though the necklace was in his hands. Adam felt his cheeks burn and he   
looked up, explaining it didn't have to mean anything more than a token to show they were committed,   
part of each other. Only he didn't get the chance because Blake's lips were on his, hard and passionate.   
He wrapped his arms around the other man's neck and savored the kisses, feeling giddy and light. 

"I don't know if you're proposin' or what..." Blake finally spoke, slightly breathless from the kissing.   
"But my answer is yes. I want this to be a forever type of thing, Adam. I can't have it any other   
way...if I do the whole love and lose thing again, with you this time, it's going to be the end of me. In   
fact..." 

He took a box out of his pocket and held it out to Adam. The rock star's fingers shook slightly as he   
opened it and inside he found a men's ring with a beautiful onyx ring. He took it out of the box and held   
it up, feeling something engraved into the inside of the band. He moved his thumb away to read the words   
out loud. 

"Where you go, I will go..." Adam felt a lump in his throat as he looked up at Blake. "So what are you   
saying, Blake?" A little smile quirked the corner of his lips. "Are YOU proposing?" 

"Well, I don't know if two guys can get married 'round here. Can't in Oklahoma..." It was Blake's turn to   
blush a little himself now. "But...you know...fuck the government. We might not be able to get married,   
but that doesn't mean we can't be together for good. An' someday, if you want...we could even, you know,   
have a little get together...make it, you know, kinda non-legal like offical . Though at the end of the   
day, all that matters is what we feel in our hearts...and my heart belongs to you. It's really that   
simple."

Adam laughed and let Blake put the ring on his finger. Then he took the necklace from the other man and   
draped the chain around his neck, fixing the clasp on it. Blake straightened it, letting the silver band   
and the little guitar charm fall against his chest. It was so strange they had both given each other   
tokens of commitment, but everything about the last nearly three years had been strange. And in the end,   
maybe that's why they were built to last. What they hadn't wasn't perfect, but it was strong and   
sometimes imperfect was even better. 

Perfectly imperfect. In the back of Adam's mind, he started to hear a bit of music. Most of the songs on   
his newest album had been influenced by Blake in one way or another, or flat out about Blake, but this   
time he could write a song openly about the man he loved. And how the course of their lives totally   
changed direction during that one, unforgetable season of the show that brought them together. 

"I love you, Blake." Adam took Blake's hand and held it tightly in his own. "And it's really that   
simple."


	10. Chapter 10

Two Years Later....

 

Blake looked in the mirror and fumbled with his tie a   
bit. Normally he didn't mind wearing the damn things,   
but his hands were a little shaky at the moment. At   
least he'd convinced Adam that he should be wearing   
jeans for this adventure. He'd come pretty close to   
losing on that point, but then he pulled out the   
dimples. The dimples always worked on Adam.

When the tie was straightened to his satisfaction, he   
checked out his hair and took a deep breath. He'd   
wanted these last few moments alone, because honestly   
he was nervous as hell. 

Granted, it wasn't a flat out marriage. It wasn't even   
a civil union. It was just him and Adam exchanging   
rings and saying a few words in front of twenty-five of   
their closest family and friends. They didn't come out   
and call it a 'commitment ceremony' because Blake   
though that sounded cheesy as hell, but that's   
basically what it was. And after today, the ring he'd   
worn on a chain around his neck for the last two years   
would be on his hand. 

For the rest of his life. 

Blake had vowed up and down he would never do the   
marriage thing again after two divorces, but he also   
knew that he wasn't very good at loving by halves. And   
it did mean a lot to both him and Adam to have the   
legal safeguards in place so that they could care for   
each other in an emergency. It also meant just as much,   
if not more, to be able to openly declare they were   
committed to each other for life. 

He gave one final glance into the mirror and decided he   
looked as good as he was going to look. His hair was   
more gunmetal grey than brown now and there were a few   
lines around his eyes, but he thought he was doing   
alright for forty. At least, that's how he felt with   
the way that Adam looked at him. 

"Here we go..." He couldn't help but smile at his   
reflection a moment before he turned away and headed   
out of the hotel room to pledge his life to the man he   
loved more than anything else. 

Though they'd both wanted a low profile but nice   
ceremony, the mothers had gone a little overboard and   
made sure the hotel's garden was perfectly decorated.   
Honestly Blake and Adam had both been happy to indluge   
them, it meant a lot to have their support. Especially   
from Blake's mother, whom he at first had dreaded   
talking to after his relationship with Adam had been   
outted. 

It was hard to believe it had been two years since   
then, but their lives had continued on. They were with   
each other as much as they could be with their careers   
still chugging along. Blake hadn't been sure the online   
thing would work, but he was still making music and   
that's what mattered to him, even if he would never   
have the success he'd had before his relationship with   
Adam came out. He was still a point of contention in   
the country music industry, but Blake would always be a   
country singer...though he'd picked up some rock   
influences from his partner and a little of everything   
else from his years on "The Voice." 

When he stepped out into the garden and saw Adam   
standing by the gazebo, he knew that the sacrafice he'd   
made in his career had been totally worth it.   
Popularity didn't last. You could have a long career,   
but you couldn't stay on the top of the charts forever.   
But he really did believe that love could last a   
lifetime. And he would trade all the awards and fame in   
the world for those quiet moments in the middle of the   
night listening to Adam's soft breathing, and feeling   
the warm press of the other man's body against his bare   
back. Those moments when everything in the world felt   
beautiful and right. 

Blake walked over to the gazebo and when his eyes met   
Adam's, he knew he was in the middle of another of   
those moments. He felt lucky to be alive, and lucky to   
be in love, even if it hadn't been an easy path to get   
to this point. 

"You ready for this, Big Country?" Adam smiled and   
reached for Blake's hand. 

They had opted not to have an officiant, to lead the   
ceremony themselves with an exchange of vows and rings.   
It wasn't meant to be a spectacle, just a shared moment   
with the people they loved as they acknowledged that   
they belonged to each other for life. 

Blake took Adam's hand and squeezed it gently as the   
piano music started and everyone around them took their   
seats. 

"I'm ready." He nodded and flashed a brilliant smile,   
dimples and all. "You're mine now, Rock Star."

"I've been yours since the first day we met." Dark eyes   
twinkled with humor and a twinge of emotion. "But I   
think you already knew that."

******

The party had lasted for a long time considering most   
of the group had been parents, a yenta, brothers,   
sisters and a few friends. Not your usual party animal   
crowd, though he should've known that Blake's family   
would know how to party regardless of age. Rednecks   
made even LA natives look tame. But somehow they   
avoided turning the evening into an episode of COPS. 

It was a little after midnight after the last guest   
left, leaving the newly unified men to enjoy their   
hotel room upstairs. Adam had chosen the hotel not only   
for the garden that would make a perfect setting for   
the ceremony and reception, but also because there were   
some great views of the mountains, something he knew   
Blake had come to love about California. 

Adam lagged behind to make sure his Mom got into her   
car okay, then went up to meet his...well, they hadn't   
quite decided on the pronoun yet. Husbands? Partners?   
Lifemates? Soulmates seemed fitting, but Blake said it   
was corny. At least with his mouth. The country star's   
eyes always twinkled at the phrase in a manner that   
gave his true feelings away.

After struggling with the keycard a few moments, Adam   
burst through the door. "Honey, I'm home!" 

"On the balcony..." Blake's voice called from the   
direction of the bedroom. 

On his way through the sitting room, Adam grabbed a   
bottle of champagne out of the ice bucket sitting on   
the coffee table and two glasses. Blake probably would   
prefer beer, but they could be fancy just this once.   
They had a lifetime of beer ahead of them...and right   
now, that made the rock star feel like the luckiest man   
on earth. 

Crossing the bedroom, Adam paused in the doorway that   
lead out to the balcony. The hotel was far enough out   
in the country that the stars were the center   
attraction of the light show in the night sky above   
them, nicely complimented by a crescent moon. There was   
enough light to see that Blake was sitting in one of   
the two chairs, tie undone and slouched down. The man   
was forty years old and he still hadn't mastered   
sitting up straight except when it was totally   
necessary...one of a million little things Adam loved   
about his country star so much.

"You find the champagne?" Blake asked Adam without   
turning towards him. 

"Oh yeah," He chuckled and slipped into the chair   
beside his beloved. "Time to pop the cork on this   
baby..." 

"Thank God you stayed sober enough to pop the cork. I'm   
not sure I could right now," The cowboy laughed and   
turned to Adam. "That was pretty damn amazing, wasn't   
it?" 

"Yeah..." Adam agreed, frowning in concentration as he   
fumbled with the cork. With a loud pop, it went sailing   
off into the night. "Oh shit..."

Blake started laughing, the sound booming through the   
darkness along with the clapping of his hands. "Touch   
down!" 

Adam couldn't reply right away because the champagne   
was flowing out of the bottle in a flood. He lifted it   
his mouth hurriedly and drank, ending up with much more   
in his mouth than he expected. So much that he started   
coughing, the bubbles rising up into her throat and   
making his nose burn. 

"Easy there.." Blake slapped him on the back several   
times. "I would think a rock star would know how to   
drink champagne." 

Adam squeaked a hoarse reply, still coughing a little.   
He let Blake take the bottle of out of his hands and   
watched as his partner took a big drink. He wiped his   
mouth on the sleeve of his blazer without a single   
cough. 

"Oh shut up..." He managed to wheeze in reply. "You   
probably think champagne is better in a mason jar too."

"Fuck yeah!" Blake laughed and sat the bottle down on   
the little table at his side. Then he belched quietly   
against the back of his hand. 

"You can take the redneck out of the country, but you   
can't take the country out of the redneck." Adam   
countered teasingly.

"Damn straight." He smirked back. "And now you're a   
redneck by marriage, so we might have to get us some   
mason jars." 

Adam groaned and pretended to look aghast. Then his   
eyes caught Blake's and they both cracked up. Their   
hands met in the darkness, fingers entwining like it   
was the most natural thing in the world. 

"If that's what makes you happy...well...they used to   
say happy wife, happy life." He shrugged, smiling a   
little. 

"I'm not the wife." Blake shot him a withering look in   
the dark. "And neither are you. We're both the   
husbands, I guess. Or Partners. Whatever." 

The country singer paused a moment, giving Adam's hand   
a little squeeze before he continued. "I don't think   
the title thing matters, really. What matters is that   
you're mine and I'm yours. Forever." 

Adam felt a lump of emotion come into his throat and he   
nodded in the darkness. Every night he'd gone to bed   
thinking Blake would never return his love had been   
worth it to have him for the rest of his life. Every   
moment of fear, every risk, it had all been worth it. 

"I couldn't agree more." He replied, tugging Blake's   
hand lightly to get him to look over. Then Adam leaned   
over and claimed his mouth gently, feeling like his   
heart might explode from happiness. 

And the very best part of all was knowing that when he   
woke up the next morning, Blake would be there at his   
side. And the next morning. And the next. As the years   
passed by and they grew old together. Life wouldn't be   
perfect, it never was, but whatever they faced in the   
future they could get through because they had each   
other. 

Always.


End file.
